Month: August 2005

  • Time Off

    I don’t need to go to town tomorrow.  I may not ever need to go in
    to drive the rehab van again.  I was planning to go, until Greyfox
    told me he’d talked to some of the rehab clients at the farmer’s market
    today and they said the ranch had discontinued the NA van for
    lack of interest.

    I called the ranch.  Nobody in authority was there, but the person
    I talked to said that tomorrow the clients are going to the state fair,
    and that the director had indeed announced that the NA van was being
    cut because of lack of interest.  Nobody gave a thought to telling
    me and saving me that 100-mile round trip.  They treat their
    volunteers like crap.

    Some weeks I take as many as 12 people to the meeting, other weeks I
    take only 3 or 4.  Often, it depends on factors such as the
    weather or how hard people have been working in the potato field or the
    greenhouse or the pig barn.  Sometimes they’re too exhausted to go
    to a meeting.  The admin is AA-biased and seem to look for excuses
    to cut out the once-weekly NA meeting.

    That bothers me some, because some of those clients are poly-addicted
    and can use NA.  There’s an attitude common to many in AA that as
    long as you aren’t drinking you’re all right.  I see people
    obviously cranked up or downed out at AA meetings, and occasionally we
    smell marijuana smoke drifting in from the group around the back door.

    I knew when I volunteered for that job that the ranch ran a flawed
    program, and I was hoping to be able to plug a few leaks on a
    one-to-one basis.  I did what I could.  Now, I’ve got more
    time and energy to spare for my life and my work.  I can use it.

    I will still need to make occasional trips to town for supplies. 
    I want to see Greyfox once in a while, too.  It has been months
    since I was in there on a Sunday when I could go to a Double Trouble in
    Recovery meeting.  That’s my favorite 12-step program, for people
    who are both addicts and insane
    have mental illness and or are taking
    psychiatric medications.  It is the least pretentious and least
    cultlike program I’ve experienced.  We do a lot of cross-talk, as
    opposed to the serial monologues you hear at AA — it’s more like a
    therapy group, more like what I like.  Maybe I’ll go this Sunday.


    I had a difficult time settling down and focusing on my work today.  I was doing a reading for screaminginmyhead
    and every time I put on the headphones and opened the psychic channels
    I was flooded with angst and distress from Katrina’s victims.  I
    know I’m not alone in that.  Lots of empathic people are picking
    up on it.  It’s hard not to.

    Weeks before the water is pumped out of New Orleans after they rebuild
    the levees, and months before public utilities are all back
    online.  Years before some things are rebuilt, and others are
    beyond recovery.  Contaminated water supplies, tombs awash,
    corpses both fresh and ancient floating around, well-armed looters and
    nervous National Guard troops — New Orleans is not a great place to be
    right now.

    I surfed around in the NOLA metro today, and found several people talking about not going back after the all-clear is given, just as I predicted.

  • …and more:

    I know that anyone interested in this could go to WWLBLOG or turn on
    CNN, but I guess that’s not the point for me.  The string of
    entries I copied in here this morning was complete, verbatim, nothing left
    out.  This bunch is edited, just a choice few included.


    Updates as they come in on Katrina


    04:13 PM CDT on Wednesday, August 31, 2005


    Tom Planchet

    4:12 P.M. – President Bush: We are witnessing one of the worst
    natural disasters in our history.

    Bush: This recovery will take years.

    Bush: FIrst priority to save lives.


    4:11 P.M. – BANDA ACEH, Indonesia (AP) — The scenes of
    devastation from the Gulf Coast are all too familiar to survivors of the
    December tsunami in Asia.

    A World Bank executive in Sri Lanka says she prays and hopes not many
    women in the U-S will suffer as she has. She lost her brother in the
    December 26th tsunami that raked over Asian nations. She and others have
    strong memories of the event when they see the destruction left by
    Hurricane Katrina.

    An Indonesian man who lost his wife the tsunami says he would like to
    help the victims of Hurricane Katrina, but all he has is prayers.

    Another man, who lost his wife and daughter in December, says, “God has
    made us equals in birth, life and death.”

    Though damage from Katrina is enormous, the rising death count is far
    short of the 200-thousand dead or missing following the tsunami.


    4:03 P.M. – (AP) Michael Leavitt, secretary of Health and Human
    Services, announced he had declared a public health emergency in the
    area stretching from Louisiana to Florida. “We are gravely concerned
    about the potential for cholera, typhoid and dehydrating diseases that
    could come as a result of the stagnant water and the conditions,” he
    said.

    Chertoff and Leavitt spoke at a news conference attended by an unusual
    array of department and agency heads, each of whom came equipped with a
    list of actions already taken by the administration.

    For his part, Bush flew over the storm-affected area during the day on
    his way to Washington from his Texas ranch. With the administration
    eager to demonstrate a rapid responsiveness to the human tragedy, the
    president also arranged to make public remarks in the Rose Garden after
    returning to the White House.

    3:55 P.M. – 40-year veteran photographer Willie Wilson: Maybe one
    other time in my career did I shoot pictures crying.

    3:54 P.M. – Wilson: People were passing out in the heat in front
    of me.

    3:52 P.M. – Chalmette man. I spent 40 hours on a roof then God
    sent a boat from a neighbor’s house floating by and we took it to safety.

    3:52 P.M. – (AP) Gov. Kathleen Blanco has said that she wants the
    Superdome evacuated within two days because the situation has been
    worsening there. The water has been rising, the air conditioning was out
    and toilets were broken.

    3:50 P.M. – Crying woman: “I’ll never stay for a hurricane again.”

    3:49 P.M. – Survivor from Chalmette: We spent two days on a roof,
    swam to a storefront, food was pouring out, we ate it, we drank the
    water. We had to do something. There’s no help.

    3:48 P.M. – WASHINGTON (AP) — From Navy ships and Army
    helicopters to the USNS Comfort hospital ship, the Pentagon is
    mobilizing possibly an unprecedented U.S. rescue-and-relief mission for
    areas devastated by Hurricane Katrina.

    3:47 P.M. – Man rescued after spending night on Chalmette High
    School roof for two days: “It’s all gone.”

    3:46 P.M. – Tugboat captain: We have so little help. Send us some
    food and water immediately!

    3:44 P.M. – Tugboat captain who rescued those in Chalmette.
    “Without more help, many people will die.”

    3:41 P.M. – (AP) — With law officers and National Guardsmen
    focused on saving lives, looters around the city spent another day
    Wednesday brazenly ransacking stores for food, beer, clothing,
    appliances — and guns.

    Gov. Kathleen Blanco said she has asked the White House to send more
    people to help with evacuations and rescues, thereby freeing up National
    Guardsmen to stop looters.

    “Once we get the 3,000 National Guardsmen here, we’re locking this place
    down,” Mayor Ray Nagin said. “It’s really difficult because my opinion
    of the looting is it started with people running out of food, and you
    can’t really argue with that too much. Then it escalated to this kind of
    mass chaos where people are taking electronic stuff and all that.”

    Amid the chaos Wednesday, thieves commandeered a forklift and used it to
    push up the storm shutters and break the glass of a pharmacy. The crowd
    stormed the store, carrying out so much ice, water and food that it
    dropped from their arms as they ran. The street was littered with
    packages of ramen noodles and other items.

    Looters also chased down a state police truck full of food. The New
    Orleans police chief ran off looters while city officials themselves
    were commandeering equipment from a looted Office Depot. During a state
    of emergency, authorities have broad powers to take private supplies and
    buildings for their use.

    3:40 P.M. – WWL photographer Willie Wilson: People being rescued
    from Chalmette were begging for water, wanted to talk to family members.
    People rescued in Chalmette were ferried across to Algiers. People hot
    and parched from days on roof tops.

    3:38 P.M. – HOUSTON (AP) — Red Cross workers today began
    transforming what was once known as the Eighth Wonder of the World —
    into temporary housing.

    Buses will shuttle thousands of Hurricane Katrina evacuees from the
    Superdome in New Orleans to the vacant Astrodome in Houston.

    Cots and blankets for up to 25-thousand people are being set up on the
    Astrodome floor.

    Other areas of the stadium are being configured to accommodate refugees
    with varying needs, including a nursery. Stadium managers are working to
    get T-V’s and find programming to allow people to keep up with the
    latest news about flooded New Orleans.

    The Astrodome agreement was worked out by Texas Governor Rick Perry and
    Louisiana Governor Kathleen Blanco.

    3:33 P.M. – (AP) — The latest video from New Orleans shows
    apartment buildings with people crowded on balconies and roofs. Below,
    flood waters lap at the second floor. Two children standing on one roof
    held up a sign that read: “Help us.”

    A Blackhawk helicopter crew rescued at least eight people from a roof
    where, in red spray paint, was written the words “Diabetic, Heart
    Transplant, Need transportation.”

    Two-by-two, the chopper hoisted the people off the roof as the wash from
    its rotors blew shingles off another section of the building and caused
    small waves in the water below.

    Other shots show people standing at windows and on balconies, some
    waving white towels to attract the attention of possible rescuers.

    The flood waters cover everything as far as the eye can see.

    In the bright sunlight, there’s a sheen caused by gasoline seeping from
    the underground tanks of a gas station. Three people who were standing
    in the bed of a flooded pickup truck later waded and swam through those
    waters, trying to reach safety.

    3:25 P.M. – Truong: A man said he was carjacked at gunpoint.
    Other residents of the Uptown-area say they are afraid to leave their
    homes because of the lack of security.

    3:18 P.M. – WWL-TV’s Thanh Truong reports the water from the Lake
    is rising to meet with the River in Uptown.

    3:10 P.M. – (AP) President Bush flew overhead in Air Force One to
    assess the damage in Southeast Louisana and the Gulfport-area of
    Mississippi.
    Click here
    .

    3:01 P.M. – The latest video from New Orleans shows apartment
    buildings with people crowded on balconies and roofs. Below, flood
    waters lap at the second floor. Two children standing on one roof held
    up a sign that read: “Help us.”
    Click here
    .

    2:20 P.M. – From Weezie Porter: WWL-TV Sales account executive. I
    evacuated with my family to Nashville. The people we are staying with
    have a relative in the Chateau Living Center in Kenner 716 Village Road.
    Their phone is working from time to time 504-464=0604. They report that
    all of the nurses have left, Only a few aides left there that have been
    working since Friday. They were supposed to be evacuated by bus but they
    did not show up. No medications have been given since Sunday,. 4
    patients have died.

  • More on Katrina

    This morning I checked WWLBLOG again.  Here’s a little sample of today’s chronology in New Orleans:

    1:45 P.M. – WWL-TV’s Mike Ross says “do not come back (to Slidell
    and Grand Isle).”


    1:39 P.M. – Hoss: Wind damage seen at the Target store on
    Clearview Pkwy.

    1:28 P.M. – WWL-TV’s Mike Hoss said the I-10/Causeway interchange
    has turned into a massive first aid station. 50 ambulances are stationed
    there, and those who need immediate medical attention are being kept
    there in tents. Black Hawk helicopters and other rescue copters are
    constantly ferrying evacuees in to the area.

    1:20 P.M. – (AP) Mayor Ray Nagin says at least hundreds of people
    are dead — maybe thousands — in New Orleans. “We know there is a
    significant number of dead bodies in the water,” and others dead in
    attics, Mayor Ray Nagin said. Asked how many, he said: “Minimum,
    hundreds. Most likely, thousands.”

    1:12 P.M. – WWL-TV’s Josh McElveen describes the stench coming
    from the bathrooms in the Superdome as horrific.

    1:03 P.M. – Mayor Nagin: Medical ship on the way to New Orleans.

    12:56 P.M. – Governor Blanco – Time is not on our side for
    stopping the levee break. There were two breaches, when we thought there
    was only one. Communicatiion, or lack of same caused the problem.

    12:55 P.M. – MIAMI (AP) — Miami-based Carnival Cruise Lines says
    it is considering a federal request that the company use some of its
    cruise ships as emergency shelters or help in Hurricane Katrina relief
    efforts in some other way.

    12:53 P.M. – Governor Blanco – thousands still need to be rescued.

    12:52 P.M. – Governor Blanco: We will rebuild.

    12:51 P.M. – Governor Blanco: The magnitude of this is
    overwhelming.

    12:15 P.M. – Army Corps: 1,200 sandbags that are 20,000 pounds
    each are being brought in to bridge gap…water level is no longer
    rising.

    12:11 P.M. – Army Corps: Water has become level with the Lake in
    the city so no more water should flow into the city, except at high tide.

    12:10 P.M. – Engineers and construction experts are at the 17th
    Street Canal. They’ve filled 100, 3,000 pound sandbags and are trying to
    drop the bags and concrete barriers into the area.

    11:49 A.M. – (AP) AUSTIN, Texas — Texas is opening its doors to
    hurricane refugees from neighboring Louisiana.

    Texas Governor Rick Perry says he expects evacuees to start arriving
    within the next 24 hours at the Houston Astrodome. He says Louisiana
    Governor Kathleen Blanco asked him this morning if the Astrodome could
    house the 23-thousand people currently being sheltered at the Superdome
    in Louisiana, and he quickly agreed. He says even before the request,
    Texas officials had been talking about using the Astrodome as a
    long-term shelter for people already stranded in Texas because of the
    storm.

    Perry says the hurricane survivors are welcome in Texas for “as long as
    they want to stay.” Children who are sheltered at the Astrodome will be
    able to attend public schools in Houston. Perry says the Astrodome
    schedule has been cleared through December.

    11:46 A.M. – WASHINGTON (AP) — Federal emergency officials are
    looking for two-thousand Homeland Security Department workers to
    volunteer for hurricane relief efforts. The head of the Federal
    Emergency Management Agency has told Homeland Security Secretary Michael
    Chertoff a-thousand people are needed within 48 hours and two-thousand
    within a week.

    11:40 – (AP) Roving bands of looters are breaking into stores in
    Carrollton area to get food and supplies. They’ve also stolen guns and
    armed themselves.

  • We’ve been interviewed.

    Gabriel Spitzer from APRN (Alaska Public Radio Network) spent this
    afternoon at Felony Flats with Greyfox.  He brought along a copy
    of one of Greyfox’s poems and had him read it for the audience, asked a lot of questions, and he
    interviewed Mike the landlord and a few other bystanding denizens
    besides Greyfox.  The edited version of all that will air as a
    segment on the award-winning program, AK.

    screaminginmyhead was looking for people who wanted to be interviewed, so I jumped on her bandwagon.  Here are her questions and my answers:

    1) If I was a person of pure unconditional love, how would I think,
    feel and act, and how different would my life be? How would other
    people respond to me?

    My life won’t change much when my unconditional love reaches a state of
    completion or “purity”.  All that will change is that there will
    be no more of those minor fear reactions I still occasionally
    experience, and instead of being totally accepting only of those I know
    and with whom I choose to associate,that acceptance will extend to the
    whole universe.  

    I have already transcended my previous desire to cling to those I love,
    and I don’t try to change anyone.  My current lack of total
    universal acceptance is manifested in my tendency to avoid those whose
    behavior threatens or repels me — not that I avoid them completely –
    what I mean is that I don’t hang out with them.  I don’t hate
    anyone, although I see a lot of behavior I don’t like and don’t want to
    be part of.

    I suppose that when my self-transformation is complete I’ll have no
    more guilt or self-doubt.  It seems that I’m going to end up being
    the last person in the universe that I learn to love unconditionally.

    Other people will continue to respond to me the same way they do now,
    based upon their own perception, preconceptions, and level of awareness.  It is
    within my power to manipulate the responses of only a fraction of the
    people with whom I come into contact and I don’t care enough about
    their opinions of me to make the attempt.  People accept me as I
    am, or they don’t.  It will always be that way.

    2) If I was given a million dollars to start a charity – what cause would I choose and why?

    That’s tough, because a million wouldn’t really do what I want to do,
    but it might serve as seed money to attract other people to help me
    establish the wilderness retreat center, youth rehab center, intensive
    drug recovery program and artists’ colony that I’ve been dreaming of
    for decades.  I just want to provide a place for those who need
    such a place.

     

    3) I am given 24 hours to get my affairs in order – how would I spend the hours?

    As much as I would hate dying and leaving this mess for someone else to
    clean up, I would not spend my last day frantically cleaning
    house.  A day wouldn’t begin to do the job.

    I wouldn’t take off and travel to any place I’ve always wanted to go,
    because there are too many such places, both ones that I’ve never been
    and those that I’ve been to and want to go back.

    I wouldn’t need to rush around telling people that I love them. 
    All my nearest and dearest have heard it plenty of times, and a lot of
    near-strangers have been told, too, sometimes to their astonishment or
    incredulity.  

    I’d write a will so that Doug and Greyfox don’t end up fighting over
    the books and the rock collection.  Then I’d leave a farewell
    message on Xanga.  Then I’d take Koji out for a walk around the
    neighborhood one last time.

     

    4) I am told I MUST take revenge on one individual who has scorned me.
    I must reach down to the evil depths of my being – who, what and why?

    And who, pray tell, is going to tell me that I MUST do any such thing,
    and enforce it?  Let’s get real.  The “evil depths of my
    being?”  Where’s that?  “Scorned me?”  What do I care
    who scorns me and why would I trouble myself with such a person?

     

    5) Who is my higher power and what substantiates my belief?

    I usually refer to my HP as “Spirit” or my spirit guides, except when
    I’m talking about it in 12-step meetings.  There, I say, “God”,
    because that’s the language they speak and understand.  It’s not a
    who, it’s a what, non-human, genderless and often plural.

     The Urantia Book refers to something it calls the Celestial
    Hierarchy, all the way from the First Source and Center of the
    Superuniverse of Universes, down through Creator Sons, Mother Spirits,
    archangels, angels and midway creatures and more.  If I were
    looking for something to believe in, I think I’d go for that.

    I can’t “substantiate my belief” because I don’t believe.  People
    believe in things they aren’t sure of, that they’ve never experienced
    or known.  I know my Guides as well as I know my family. 
    They know me better than anyone does.  Their presence is as real
    to me and even more constant than that of my family.

    If these non-corporeal beings with whom I commune and upon whose
    guidance I rely are part of the celestial hierarchy, I don’t know their
    titles or rank or names.  They don’t seem to mind that I can’t
    call them by name.  They always respond to a call for help.


    Okay, now to bring things back down to earth for a bit.  Summer is
    over, here.  It’s barely eleven PM, and almost dark outside. 
    I turned on the porch light when I went to the outhouse just now, but
    it doesn’t illuminate the inside of the outhouse, only the path out to
    it.  When I got there, I paused and groped around on the wall for
    the light switch.  There isn’t one, of course… never has
    been.  I’m losin’ it.  Now, about six and a half hours after
    I first said I was going to, I’m going to bed… after I get something
    to eat.

  • workin’ my butt off
    er, knees down
    umm, fingers to the bone
    UPDATED,
    and update updated


    Actually, it is the butt and the knees, more than anything else, that
    are feeling the pain from these last few days of work, but I’m not
    noticing any physical changes at all, anywhere.  The butt is still
    there, all of it.  The knees aren’t visibly bruised, although they
    feel as if they are.  Even the fingers, which have been doing all
    the work, don’t look any different.

    I have been spending about fourteen hours a day at the comp for a
    while, don’t remember whether it’s three days, four days,
    five….  Days run together when I get focused on something this
    way.  But it hasn’t been a single focus… well, except for having
    my eyes focused on the monitor all those hours.  I’m very pleased
    with our new LCD monitor.  My eyes don’t hurt as much as they used
    to with the CRT.

    Mostly I’ve been working.  Finally, we got some requests for readings after opening KaiOaty up for business again.  I did one last night, answered questions for newsgirlbahrain,
    and today posted the past life reading Greyfox had done for her. 
    He has another past life reading assignment (I love getting to tell him
    what to do.) and then if I’m lucky I will
    get more work to do, too.  I’ve missed the work so much that I was
    tempted a few days ago to break my own rules and do a reading for
    someone who hadn’t read or didn’t take seriously the FAQs, disclaimers
    and instructions on the site.  Greyfox advised against it and so
    did my spirit guides, so I waited and next day there was a real
    client.  Yaay!

    That’s not the only work I’ve been doing for these however-many days.  Of course
    that isn’t all I’ve done.  I’m not as speedy doing readings in
    this venue as I am face to face as at a festival or something, what
    with taking a picture of the card spread, typing it out, proofreading,
    notifying the client that the thing was posted, and all.  But it
    doesn’t take me half a week to do a reading, either.  Most of this
    time I have been studying online tutorials and working on the pages for
    our Addicts Unlimited website.

    The work has gone from being an agonizing challenge to learn how to do
    the work, to being simply work.  I had a breakthrough of sorts
    midafternoon yesterday.  A whole series of “Aha!” moments when
    suddenly what had been a foreign language started making sense. 
    Up to that point, there had been lots of times that I’d just stared at
    the screen thinking, “WTF?”  I’d lower my head into my hands, take
    a deep breath, then switch to solitaire until I could face the foreign
    gibberish again.

    I’m attributing much of my progress to the easing of that latest M.E.
    flareup.  I’m still having more than the usual number of
    large-muscle mishaps: the sensorimotor stumbles and fumbles, but my
    eyes are focusing better now and my mind is out of the fog.  I
    love when this happens.  I’ll flow with it, but I’m not apt to
    mistake it for a remission, not with these knees and the butt. 
    Those are the body parts that are in contact with this ergonomic office
    chair, and they feel as if someone has been beating on them.  Each
    of these last few days, I’ve been so anxious to get the web work done,
    and so pleased with my progress, that I’ve kept at it until the
    discomfort and fatigue drive me off to my bed.

    Today, I woke early and did some housework before sitting down
    here.  I’ve worked through with only a few breaks for food and my
    body’s other needs, and some distractions when the dog or the cats
    demanded my attention.  I still don’t have a finished web page,
    but in the absence of such tangible evidence I can gauge today’s
    success by the absence of solitaire breaks.  I’m getting
    somewhere.  Since my shoulders and neck have now joined my knees
    and butt with the fiery beaten-up feeling, the place I’m getting off to
    next is my bed.  Back to my book….

    Update:

    The above was originally posted at 4:20 PM.  I didn’t toddle off to bed after all.  I made dinner for Doug and
    me, then I sat back down here to see if I’d had any comments. 
    From there, I don’t know how it happened, but I ended up doing some
    Xanga surfing.  I visited a few of my old friends and some of the
    comments there led me to some new people, more subs for that list
    that’s long been so long I’m ashamed to display it.  All in all, I
    think the time was better spent than it would have been if I’d been
    reading trashy fiction in bed.  Not that Lee Child writes trash –
    he’s one of the best writers I’ve encountered in years — but the
    thriller genre in general is not exactly uplifting or
    enlightening.  It’s simply entertaining.

    I found this entertaining, too:

    Kinetic Artificial Technician Hardwired for Yelling, Logical Yardwork and Nocturnal Nullification
    I did one for The Kid, too:
    Digital Operational Unit Generated for Logical Assassination and Scientific Sabotage
    I’ve generated names for Greyfox and KaiOaty, too.  Once I start these silly things, it’s hard to stop.
    Morpheus
    Morpheus

    ?? Which Of The Greek Gods Are You ??
    brought to you by Quizilla

    updating again:

    Darn, here’s yet another update.  I can’t seem
    to get it all said in one go.  
    I want to express my appreciation to the Xanga gods for increasing our
    image storage space.  I had hit my limit a year or more ago, went
    through and deleted a lot of things (and left some holes in some of my
    best old photo blogs), and then when the deleting thing was just too
    harrowing, I emailed Xanga and asked how I could buy, rent, borrow or
    steal more space.  They then told me they weren’t enforcing the
    limit, so just go ahead and exceed it.  I thought they might have
    told me that sooner, but NOOOO.  Anyhow, now I’ve gone from being
    over my limit by a lot, to using only 3% of my allotted space, presto
    just like magic.

  • “…whitecaps on Canal Street”
    UPDATED below


    That’s the news I heard on NPR when I turned on the radio this
    morning.    Hurricane Katrina breached two of the levees
    protecting New Orleans.  According to WWLTV.com,
    the break in 17th Street Canal Levee is now 200 feet wide.  Water
    around the Superdome is a foot and a half to two feet deep and
    rising.  Thousands of people are trapped and downed power lines
    and floating debris are making boating hazardous.  Sandbags are
    being hauled in, but some official sources don’t think they can stop
    the flooding.  They don’t expect the water level to stabilize
    until the water in the city, which is built below sea level, reaches
    the level of Lake Ponchartrain.

    Since I heard the news, I’ve had Led Zep running through my head, “When
    the levee breaks, Mama you’ve got to move.”  The ordeal is just
    beginning for those affected by Katrina, and I don’t suppose there are
    many in this country who won’t be affected one way or another. 
    Economists are talking about how this will raise gasoline prices even
    faster and drive some airlines out of business.  Those whitecaps
    on Canal Street are just little waves, signaling a long series of wave
    after wave of aftereffects.  I’m reminded of what No Eyes
    predicted, and Edgar Cayce.  Are we ready for this?  I
    wonder….

    I have a little prediction of my own.  Some of the survivors of
    Katrina, homeless, jobless, and discouraged, will be looking for new
    homes on higher ground.   In the same way that common Alaskan
    speech gained a little Texas-Oklahoma twang from the influx of
    pipeliners in the 1970s, I’ll soon start hearing more of the soft drawl
    of the South around here.  I wonder how long it will be before
    someone from New Orleans moves in at Felony Flats.

    **groan** **sigh**  I just had another little memory flash, one of
    the bumper stickers current in the ‘seventies when our state license
    plates pictured a standing brown bear:  “Welcome to Alaska,
    pilgrim.  The grizzlies need feed.”  It’s not out of the
    frying pan into the fire.  More like out of the soup bowl into the
    freezer.


    UPDATES


    10:45 AM Alaska time:


    Some six-thousand National Guard personnel from Louisiana and
    Mississippi who would otherwise be available to help deal with the
    aftermath of Hurricane Katrina are in Iraq.”

    11:10 AM:
    Senator Thad Cochran of Mississippi says “this is
    going to be the most expensive natural disaster that’s hit the United States
    in history.”
    WWLTV.com

    Hurricane floods may boost West Nile virus.
    NewScientist


  • Spells and Charms

    This comment from spinksy yesterday:

    Your book looks interesting.
    Is it?

    referred to The Element Encyclopedia of 5000 Spells:
    The Ultimate Reference Book for the Magical Arts
    By Judika Illes

    The book is one of two by the same author (the other is The Element Encyclopedia of Witchcraft: The Complete A-Z for the Entire Magical World),
    that Doug checked out from the public library on our trip to Willow
    last Thursday.  It was on the new arrivals shelf, and he held the
    open book out in front of me as I was passing on my way to the fiction
    shelves to pick up a couple more of Lee Child’s Jack Reacher
    novels.  (Reacher is the latest addition to my list of fuckable
    fictional characters.)  I paused long enough to take in the
    considerable bulk of the tome, and the title, and told Doug, “Just be
    careful with that stuff.  Remember this is the real world, not
    game reality.”

    He gave me his patented crooked grin and a facetious, “Awww,
    Mom.”  Then he reassured me that he wasn’t going to be
    metaphorically playing with metaphysical fire. 

    The book was lying on the coffee table yesterday when Doug’s friend
    Matt came in.  Later in the evening, I heard Matt ask Doug if the
    book was any good.  Doug replied, “I guess so, but I haven’t found
    any spells for fireballs in it.”

    Matt and Seph laughed, and one of them said, “No fireballs?!  Then
    it’s not much of a spellbook, is it?”  They’re all conditioned to
    the Square-Enix gaming reality where spells come in varieties such as
    Ice, Wind, Water, Fire, etc., and do animated damage consistent with
    their elemental type and commensurate with the casting character’s
    experience level.  I’m familiar with and skilled at that sort of
    magic, too.

    Thirty-six years ago, I knew nothing about the fancy, flashy fantasy
    magic in video games because not even Pong had been invented yet. 
    At that time, I thought I knew nothing of “real” magic, either, but I
    was mistaken.  As I began then to study metaphysics and “occult”
    lore, I discovered that there were numerous little charms and spells
    I’d picked up here and there, from books, parents, friends, movies,
    etc.

    There’s the classic, “abracadabra” spell, of course, and the crossed
    fingers behind the back charm that makes it okay to tell a lie. 
    There’s the “Jinx! You owe me a Coke,” that kids would try to be the
    first to shout when two of them spoke the same words at the same
    time.  One of my favorites is, “shotgun!” the spell that wins one
    the privilege of riding up front beside the driver.  “Dibsies,” is
    another useful spell.

    What constitutes a magical spell or charm, and what one can and should
    expect from them, depends on where you’re coming from, I guess. 
    The topic is fraught with superstitious angst for many people. 
    When Doug and I were checking out at the library, the assistant
    librarian serving us said, “I’m glad to see that someone is checking
    those books out.”  This tells me several things.  Coupled
    with their pristine condition, I’d say it suggests that they’ve been
    there a while (I’d noticed them at least a month ago.) and Doug is the
    first person to check them out. 

    The woman’s tone of relief that
    they’re getting some circulation suggests that she might have
    recommended their acquisition and possibly the head librarian had some
    reservations.  It could also mean that she’s a solitary Wiccan and
    has been hoping that she wasn’t the only one in the valley.  If
    that’s the case, her pleasure is misplaced.  In this household,
    we’re no more Wiccan than we are Christian, Muslim, or Jew. 
    Doug’s a non-observant Secular Humanist, and I’m a gnostic.  No,
    not agnostic, GNOSTIC.

    Librarians as a class tend to be some of the most vocal proponents of
    First Amendment freedoms, but they do have to exercise some caution,
    especially in certain communities.  Book-burnings still occur…
    and sometimes whole libraries are burned because fearful and ignorant
    people fail to understand that they can’t destroy a meme by wiping out
    its written expression.  That’s like attempting a conquest by
    attacking the map.  But I digress….

    To understand how our remote ancestors viewed the power of written
    words, we need to imagine (or remember) when none but the elite few
    could write or read.  In the Elder Eddas of Norse myth, the
    Havamal tells in Odin’s words how he sacrificed an eye and hung on Yggdrasil, the World Tree, to gain the power of runes.

        Wounded I hung on a wind-swept gallows
        For nine long nights,
        Pierced by a spear, pledged to Odin,
        Offered, myself to myself
        The wisest know not from whence spring
        The roots of that ancient rood.

        They gave me no bread,
        They gave me no mead,
        I looked down;
        With a loud cry
        I took up runes;
        From that tree I fell.

        Nine lays of power
        I learned from the famous Bolthor, Bestla’ s father:
        He poured me a draught of precious mead,
        Mixed with magic Odrerir.

        Waxed and throve well;
        Word from word gave words to me,
        Deed from deed gave deeds to me.

        Runes you will find, and readable staves,
        Very strong staves,
        Very stout staves,
        Staves that Bolthor stained,
        Made by mighty powers,
        Graven by the prophetic God.

        For the Gods by Odin, for the Elves by Dain,
        By Dvalin, too, for the Dwarves,
        By Asvid for the hateful Giants,
        And some I carved myself:
        Thund, before man was made, scratched them,
        Who rose first, fell thereafter.    

        Know how to cut them,
        know how to read them,
        Know how to stain them,
        know how to prove them,
        Know how to evoke them,
        know how to score them,
        Know how to send them,
        know how to send them.

        Better not to ask than to over-pledge
        As a gift that demands a gift.
        Better not to send
        Than to slay too many.   

        The first charm I know is unknown to rulers
        Or any of human kind;
        Help it is named,
        for help it can give
        In hours of sorrow and anguish. 

        I know a second that the sons of men
        Must learn who wish to be leeches. 

        I know a third: in the thick of battle,
        If my need be great enough,
        It will blunt the edges of enemy swords,
        Their weapons will make no wounds.  

        I know a fourth:
        it will free me quickly
        If foes should bind me fast
        With strong chains, a chant that makes
        Fetters spring from the feet,
        Bonds burst from the hands.  

        I know a fifth: no flying arrow,
        Aimed to bring harm to men,
        Flies too fast for my fingers to catch it
        And hold it in mid-air.  

        I know a sixth:
        It will save me if a man
        Cut runes on a sapling’ s roots
        With intent to harm; it turns the spell;
        The hater is harmed, not me.  

        If I see the hall
        Ablaze around my bench mates,
        Though hot the flames,
        They shall feel nothing,
        If I choose to chant the spell. [seventh]   

        I know an eighth:
        That all are glad of,
        Most useful to men:
        If hate fester in the heart of a warrior,
        It will soon calm and cure him.   

        I know a ninth:
        When need I have
        To shelter my ship on the flood,
        The wind it calms, the waves it smoothes
        And puts the sea to sleep 

        I know a tenth:
        If troublesome ghosts
        Ride the rafters aloft,
        I can work it so they wander astray,
        Unable to find their forms,
        Unable to find their homes.  

        I know an eleventh:
        When I lead to battle old comrades in-arms,
        I have only to chant it behind my shield,
        And unwounded they go to war,
        Unwounded they come from war,
        Unscathed wherever they are

        I know a twelfth:
        If a tree bear
        A man hanged in a halter,
        I can carve and stain strong runes
        That will cause the corpse to speak,
        Reply to whatever I ask.

        I know a thirteenth
        If I throw a cup of water over a warrior,
        He shall not fall in the fiercest battle,
        Nor sink beneath the sword,  

        I know a fourteenth, that few know:
        If I tell a troop of warriors
        About the high ones, Elves and Gods,
        I can name them one by one.
        (Few can the nitwit name.)

        I know a fifteenth,
        That first Thjodrerir
        Sang before Delling’s doors,
        Giving power to Gods, prowess to Elves,
        Fore-sight to Hroptatyr Odhinn,  

        I know a sixteenth:
        If I see a girl
        With whom it would please me to play,
        I can turn her thoughts, can touch the heart
        Of any white armed woman.

        I know a seventeenth:
        If I sing it,
        The young girl will be slow to forsake me.

        I know an eighteenth that I never tell
        To maiden or wife of man,
        A secret I hide from all
        Except the love who lies in my arms,
        Or else my own sister.   

        To learn to sing them, Loddfafnir,
        Will take you a long time,
        Though helpful they are if you understand them,
        Useful if you use them,
        Needful if you need them.

        The Wise One has spoken words in the hall,
        Needful for men to know,
        Unneedful for trolls to know:

        Hail to the speaker,
        Hail to the knower,
        Joy to him who has understood,
        Delight to those who have listened.

    Incantations, invocations, evocative speech, hypnotic chant… all
    existed before we ever had the power to write them down. 
    Suddenly, once a spell could be spelled out in visible form, power
    passed outward beyond the inner circle of the mages and bards to be
    shared by anyone who possessed the secret of the runes.  And it
    was for a long time kept quite secret.  At one time in more than
    one culture it was a capital crime for a man to teach a woman to read,
    or for a woman to know how to read.

    Words have power.  Sounds have power, in their rhythm and tone, to
    affect the function of our brains.  Words, possessing meaning,
    have the power of their sound as well as their meaning.  They
    affect our emotions, but it seems plain to me that such effects
    transcend the meanings of the words.  My emotions can be stirred
    by words sung or spoken in languages I don’t understand. 

    When I sat down here to write of spells and charms, I put on the CD of
    Solaris Universalis.  Three of its tracks are sung in the Enochian
    Language and others are in Sanscrit and Latin.  I chose this music
    because it casts a spell on me.  It elevates my soul, and I wanted
    to be in not just an altered state but an elevated state before I
    attempted to write about spells and charms.  In my experience, it
    adds to the power of such sound to sing or chant along with it. 
    My voice resonates with Patrick Bernhardts and the effect of the words
    and music on me is increased.

    Any spellbook you may find will probably be filled with spells and
    charms for base and venal purposes, or for trivial purposes. 
    There are exceptions of course, and some of them go by different
    names.  Hymnals and prayer books are spellbooks of a sort.  I
    first experimented with and then seriously practiced some of the common
    sort of magickal spells, thirty-some years ago.  I sought to use
    magic to conform my environment to my will.  I had some success,
    but it was disappointing and disillusioning when my manifestations
    turned out to be not quite what I ultimately desired.

    Then I chose a different path.  I turned instead to
    self-transformation, seeking to conform my will to the Divine
    Will.  I have been unreservedly pleased with the results to the
    extent that I have been successful at that.

    One of the first things to attract me to 12-step programs was the
    powerful spells they use.  Walls are plastered with posters that
    say, “Easy does it,” “Live and let live,” “One day at a time.” 
    One thing that keeps me going back to NA is the Third Step Prayer with
    which we end each meeting.  This is one of the most powerful
    spells I’ve ever heard:

    Take my will and my life.
    Guide me in my recovery;
    and show me how to live, clean.”

    But spinksy asked about the book.  Yes, it’s a good one for anyone
    interested in folklore, mythology or magic of the lesser, mundane
    sort.  The author begins in an introduction by explaining the
    “occult” nature of her material, how it was often necessary to hide the
    truth to escape torture and death at the hands of superstitious
    folk.  She laments the absence in English of an equivalent word
    for Egyptian heka, Yoruba ashe, Polynesian mana, or Moroccan baraka.  George Lucas called it The Force, and this author calls it magic power.  She devotes a lot of space and words to her contention that it is as natural as, for example, radioactivity.

    She reprises the old truism that there is no White Magic or Black
    Magic, nothing inherently good or evil in magic.  The practitioner
    gives The Force whatever spin his intentions put on it, she says, and
    he reaps what he sows.  She cites earlier authors, and she
    contradicts herself and them from time to time.

    The magic she practices is a very material, hands-on sort.  It
    requires many props and ingredients and all the rituals inherent in all
    ceremonial magick.  I’m not a fan of ceremonial magick. 
    Every ceremonial magician I’ve ever known has been pompous and boring,
    while trying his best to be impressive and intimidating.  Not my
    cup of tea.  Aleister Crowley, speaking critically of ceremonial
    magick, said that he could achieve any of his magical aims with nothing
    more than a candle, incense, a cup and a knife. 

    As a shaman, all I really need is my “horse” (as Siberian shamans call
    their drums), but sometimes incense is nice, too, for evoking a certain
    atmosphere.  But a shaman’s aims are generally different from
    those of a ceremonial magician.  I guess I’m digressing
    again.  I’d like to share a couple of samples of spells from this
    book.

    First is Saint Dymphna’s Mental Relief Spell.  Saint Dymphna is my
    matron saint.  The reason for that is that since I’m not catholic
    I’ve sorta stuck with Dymphna because she was given to me the first
    time I was locked up in a psychicatric ward.  It was at a catholic
    hospital, and the sisters handed out Dymphna medals to all us
    loonies.  As Ms. Illes explains in the book, Dymphna is believed
    to have been a seventh century Celtic princess from Ireland or
    Britain.  Her father, obsessed with her, raped her and then
    tirelessly pursued her after she escaped from him.  He caught up
    with her in Belgium, where she died either at his hands or through
    execution as a Christian martyr after he turned her in.

    Dymphna’s spell is for healing debilitating obsessions.  Carve a
    downward pointing sword into the wax of a blue candle along with your
    name (or that of your victim client), birthday and whatever other
    identifying marks you choose (I’d use my butterfly moniker,
    fershure).  Hold the candle in your hands to charge it with your
    desires, then burn it on a Monday.

    Lastly, I give you a true classic, the Hand of Glory.  Judika Illes writes:

    This notorious and legendary amulet was
    reputedly the master item of thieves’ magic spells in Western Europe
    and the British Isles.  Allegedly the Hand of Glory ensured the sound sleep of anyone inside a house where it was carried, most frequently for purposes of theft.  The word, “sleep” may be used, but “comatose”
    is what is meant.  People within the house were rendered
    insensible and immobile, unable to awaken, sleeping like the
    dead.  That’s appropriate because the Hand of Glory is the hand of
    a dead man crafted into a candle.

    Either the left or right hand was
    acceptable, however the Hand of Glory can only be crafted from the hand
    of a convicted felon, executed by hanging, preferably at a crossroads
    and preferably convicted for murder.




    The most famous instructions are those suggested by Le Petit Albert, the influential grimoire published in Cologne in 1722:


    1. Take the hand of a dead hanged man.  Wrap it in fabric and press to remove remaining fluids.
    2. Place it in an earthen vase.
    3. Grind cinnamon, saltpeter, salt and peppercorns with a mortar and pestle.
    4. Cover the severed hand with the resulting powder.  Leave it alone for fifteen days.
    5. Then expose the hand to the sun during the Dog Days of Summer until completely dry.
    6. If the hand is still not completely dehydrated, you may place it in
    a low, slow oven with ferns and vervain, until this is accomplished.
    7.  Use the hand as a candleholder.  Form candles from the hanged man’s fat, virgin beeswax and “sesame of Lapland.”

    She goes on, with several variant recipes, tips for repeat usage, a
    couple of quicker, easier methods, a variation using a shinbone instead
    of a hand, and instructions for how to douse the candle.   Then
    she spoils all the fun with a bunch of facts including an assertion
    that the whole thing may have been the product of witch-hunters’
    imaginations.

    Doug has read more of the book than I have.  When he has found
    especially interesting passages, he has read them to me.  One of
    his more humorous comments about hex-breaking and banishing spells was
    that many of the things required in them would seem to be more
    unpleasant than the things they’re supposed to cure.

  • The Cutthroat and Corrupt World of…
    …Poetry?

    I’m a little late picking up on this, because most of the flap was
    occurring during those eleven weeks this spring when I didn’t have a
    computer.  Greyfox apparently hadn’t heard about it until
    recently, either.  He read something somewhere and mentioned it to
    me.  I asked for details and he said I should google it.

    foetry.com
    has been online for over a year, exposing fraud, nepotism and
    favoritism in the poetry publishing field.  The site’s owner has
    named names and accused various people of favoring their old
    friends, classmates, students, and lovers for prizes in the poetry
    contests which are generally the only way most poets’ work gets
    published.  He was
    anonymous for the first twelve months, until this April when one of the
    poetry contest judges and
    publishers he had outed, outed him.

    Alan Cordle is a reference librarian at Portland Community College in
    Oregon.  Given the passion with which he has been pursuing the
    inequities in poetry judging and publishing, it doesn’t take much of a
    logical leap to guess that he might also be a poet.  However, it
    is his wife, Kathleen Halme, who is the
    poet.  Ironically, Cordle has attacked a contest that she won in
    1994.  He has said, “She’s disappointed in my persistence in a
    world she feels should be hers, but we’re fine.”

    Cordle contends that the “old boy network” system now in place ensures
    that only known or well-connected poets get published.  Since the
    contests charge “reading fees” of $20 to $30,
    there’s more at stake for the young unknown poets than an author’s
    ego.  That limits the options for many struggling poets, but some
    of the publishers involved say that Cordle is wrong about it being a
    big money-making scheme for them and that they barely break even.
      Some of the poets and publishers he has accused
    have charged him with libel and slander, and at least one of them has
    gotten cease-and-desist orders against him.

    Now, Alan Caudle has another cause about which to express his outrage:  internet privacy
    Caudle remained anonymous for a year, using GoDaddy’s Domains by Proxy
    service.  Assailed by furious poets and publishers, GoDaddy
    cancelled Caudle’s service and revealed his identity.

    “I was probably naive,” Cordle said. “I thought that they would
    completely protect my privacy. That’s the whole purpose of DBP. They
    don’t do anything else but purport to protect domain privacy.”

    Yeah, he was naive.  The user agreement at DBP states, “You
    understand and agree that DBP has the absolute right and power, in
    its sole discretion and without any liability to you whatsoever, to
    close accounts (or) reveal your name and personal
    information.”

    I feel I made a wise choice when I decided that I have nothing to
    hide.  What’s the point?  The harder you try to hide
    something, the more your attempt at secrecy is going to make someone
    else want to find you out.  Many of those in the academic,
    publishing and poetry circles affected by foetry say that the system
    has long been in need of a clean-up, but they object to Caudle’s year
    of anonymous sniping.

  • The shaman I married and the Old Fart I’m married to now…

    Greyfox has gotten a lot of comment on his “new” profile pic.  His baby sister
    called it a masterpiece worthy of display in an art museum, or
    something like that.  After some of his friends from “the dox”
    (online forum where he’s a mod) saw it on his Xanga site, Greyfox
    started a thread asking them to rate the picture.  He says about
    seventy percent say it is “great” or “awesome”.  It is my favorite
    picture of him.

    This is a scan of a shot I captured on film about fifteen years ago on
    a windy day at City of Rocks State Park near Silver City, New
    Mexico.   It is unposed and I was very lucky to get it. 
    When he knows or even suspects that a camera is trained on him, he
    poses.  If he had known what his hair was doing in that wind, he’d
    probably have been holding it down.

    Greyfox says that old picture doesn’t look like him, that he never
    looked like that.  Yeah, right, the camera was lying. 
    There’s more white in his beard now, he seldom lets his hair get that
    long any more, and that old black t-shirt no longer fits, but it’s him.

    I
    had been getting weary of seeing the cellphone pose that was his
    profile pic for months, so I sneaked into his “look and feel” and
    switched it for my fave.  With all the attention it’s gotten him,
    I don’t think Greyfox minds.  I think that for my next magical
    trick, I may put up the one of him sitting on a rock in my garden,
    scratching his balls… or maybe the one of him passed out drunk on his
    cot with Muffin glaring at the camera from her perch on his
    chest.  But no, he has specifically forbidden me to post that
    shot.  Maybe the one of him naked and drunk on top of the car in
    our driveway….  OMG, don’t tell him I’m having such thoughts.

    But seriously, he’s a beautiful man.  I recognized an inner beauty
    in him even while he was pickled and poisoned and with his disordered
    personality in full expression.  He wrote a sonnet for me,
    fercrissake, before we even met!  Last night, he read to me a new
    poem he’d written, about his addiction recovery and other people’s
    relapses.  Because I entered some of his earlier poetry in a local
    public radio poetry contest (without his knowledge), he is expecting to be interviewed next
    week, not just about his poetry, but an in-depth feature on his
    life.  The reporter’s attention was caught by the poetry and he
    has been lurking at ArmsMerchant‘s
    Xanga site.  Now he wants to spend an afternoon with him, hanging
    around the stand talking about the Old Fart and Felony Flats.

     

  • I may have caused some confusion with my facetious reference to Libras
    and Geminis as “decisive”.  If so, please forgive.  I do know
    better than that, but apparently don’t know better than to joke about
    it without including the appropriate smiley.

    New pic of cats, right to left:  mom Hilary, kitten A under her
    arm, kitten B looking alert, kitten C getting some lunch, and glowing
    in the sunbeam, Nemo “Auntie Orange.”