Month: June 2002

  • The Love of my Life, part 2

    The following is part two of the story of how I became an expert shoplifter.  If you missed part one, it is here.  In part three,  I’ll get to the maguffin about the boosting, and then for those who want to know what happened next, part four.

    I’m not sure of dates, but fairly sure it was after the first of the new year (1962) when Larry and I found our first apartment. It was a third-floor walkup in one of two identical big red brick buildings just southeast of the main downtown business district of Wichita. There was one small bedroom, which we decided would be Marie’s; we slept on a convertible sofa in the living room. I remembered riding past these apartment houses as a child and wanting to live there.

    Everything just came together: Mama was being worn to a frazzle keeping up with Marie, and Grady was telling her she had to bring my daughter back to me. Marie and I wanted to be together. Granny was also burned out trying to keep up with a two-year-old. Larry was making better money than I was, taking temporary jobs through Manpower, Inc. I quit work and we set up housekeeping as a nuclear family. It was as close as I have ever been in my life to a “normal” lifestyle after the first seven years, before Daddy died.

    It got off to an exhilarating start. The day we were separately packing our things and moving in, Larry had an abscessed tooth. He got an emergency appointment with a dentist. We talked on the phone and arranged to meet near the dental office after I had hauled a load of my clothes and housewares up to the apartment. Then we would walk back together and spend the first night in our own place.

    On the walk home, Larry was feeling worse and worse. By the time we got up the stairs, he was short of breath and dizzy. He was clearly in distress, gasping for breath, unable to speak. I ran down the stairs and to the firehouse in the middle of the block, just past the other twin apartment building. I was in such a panic, I was trembling and having trouble talking, but I managed to tell a fireman what had happened to Larry, and that he had gotten a penicillin shot from the dentist.

    Three firemen grabbed their gear and followed me back to the apartment. They gave Larry oxygen and a shot of ACTH. As he was coming around, one of them explained to me that he had gone into anaphylactic shock from penicillin allergy, and that by running for them I had saved his life. There was a little extra emotional something to our cuddling that night.

    Mama brought Marie to Wichita soon after that. She also brought some housewares I had stored at the farm, and a few kitchen items that she didn’t need. One was an old Silex glass vacuum-style coffeemaker. Some of my most persistent memories of Larry involve coffee, and the brew we made in that pot was the best: just a pinch of salt in each batch. Marie (and I) watched in fascination as the steam pressure drove the water up into the funnel where the coffee brewed and, after the heat was turned off, the coffee filtered back into the pot. Simple pleasures for simple minds.

    While Larry was at work, Marie and I walked to the library where we sat comfortably in some corner where my soft voice would not disturb anyone, and I read to her from old books I had loved and newer ones such as Curious George. When he was home, the two of them played. I recall the sound of her giggles during their games of peek-a-boo, and the seriousness with which she learned to count her toes and pull her socks on. She started calling him Daddy with no prompting from anyone, and none of us ever corrected her. Larry was Daddy.

    His work became more irregular and our budget became very tight. We found an attic apartment in an old wood frame house a few blocks south of the first apartment, where the rent was less and there were two small bedrooms. Occasionally when they butchered a hog on the farm or visited the meat locker to pick up bacon or ham, Mama brought us treats. I cooked a lot of beans, rice and pasta. Concerned that Marie wasn’t getting enough protein, and also, I think, because it was important to Larry that he provide for us, he went hunting.

    There were pigeons nesting in an unfinished portion of our attic which could be accessed through a panel in the kitchen. He found a broken baseball bat in the yard, crawled through the narrow, low-ceilinged space, and clubbed pigeons. On the bird ranch in California where I’d stayed with Mama and Grady before they moved to Burrton, I had learned how to pluck and dress quail, and these birds were not much different. They were tasty, and as the population diminished the noise of the birds was less troublesome to us, and to the neighbors downstairs who thanked Larry for getting rid of the pests.

    Larry spoke frequently about Mesa Verde and Mancos, Colorado, where he had grown up. He had often visited a grandmother on the Ute Reservation there, he told me, and he had a small vocabulary of “Ute love words”, terms of affection and phrases like “nighty-night”, which he had learned from her and used with Marie and me. As spring approached, we decided to move to Mancos, where he expected to find work either in the match factory or in the woods, working for the Forest Service. We took his wages from a last stint distributing handbills, and caught a Trailways bus to Colorado.

    Larry’s mother Dolly, her mother whose name I don’t recall (Marie and I called her Grandma, just like everyone else), and Larry’s younger brother Perry Dean Ensley welcomed us and treated us like family. We had to ourselves a room off one side of Grandma’s rambling, much-added-to, house. The heat source for the whole house was a coal-burning potbelly stove in the dining room. That room had a sofa and overstuffed chairs in addition to the dining set, and was the true living room of the house. The front parlor was closed off with a blanket hung over the door, and each of the bedrooms in their little lean-to additions had its own door that was kept shut to conserve heat. We used two of the three old iron beds in our room, and divided the pile of featherbeds from the third one between our bed and Marie’s.

    With three featherbeds over us and I-don’t-know-how-many under us, the beds enveloped us. We nestled in them each morning until the sun was well up, watching the white vapor of our breath. Sometimes Marie would slip from her bed into ours for these mornings of laughter and conversation.  Sunday mornings, Larry would go out and bring back the colored comics section from the newspaper, and we would read them together in bed as I had done with my parents when I had been small.

    It was Spring, and there in the mountains nights were cold and days were brilliant and warm, filled with birdsong and the first blossoms. When we became certain that I was pregnant, we started planning for our baby. Marie was interested in the idea that I had a baby in my tummy and started calling it her own: saying, “my baby”, as she patted my belly. Larry and I began calling the baby Beedee, B.D., because we had decided to name a boy Robert (Bobby) Dean after my father’s brother and Larry’s. If a girl, she would be Barbara Deanne. Barbara, I had been told, was my half-sister’s name, my father’s daughter (along with two sons) from his first marriage.

    Dolly seemed thrilled at becoming a grandmother. This would be her first grandchild, and it might have been Grandma’s first great-grandchild as well. Larry had submitted applications everywhere he thought he might find work in the area, but no one had called. We had a lot of time together. He did some chores and maintenance jobs around the house and I cooked a little and helped Perry with his math homework and spelling.

    My mother, Little Granny, and I exchanged a lot of letters. Mama was living in Wichita with Granny now. My step-father had taken a truckload of his employer’s pigs to market and after selling them had taken the money and the truck and gone off on an alcohol binge. When the money ran out he burglarized several post offices in small Western Kansas towns for money order blanks, to extend the binge. I think at this time he was still on the loose, but before long he was arrested and ended up going to the Kansas State Penitentiary at Lansing.

    There was no phone at Grandma’s house. There was a message phone somewhere (I forget where) and someone would come by and give us a message or a number to call back. We would walk several blocks down into the business area of Mancos to a public phone to return calls. When I got a message to call Mama, I knew it had to be big news, and I supposed that it had to do with Grady.

    When I called her, she said that my husband had been there. The Army had given him compassionate leave because of marital problems. He had been waiting on the doorstep the previous day, when Granny returned home. He had found a letter in the mailbox that I had written to Mama, and saw my return address: General Delivery, Mancos, Colorado. He had spent the night there in Wichita and caught a bus that morning, saying he was coming to kill Larry.

    I panicked.  I packed hurriedly, tearfully said goodbye to Grandma and Dolly, and walked back downtown with Marie and my suitcase.  Mama wired me money for bus fare through Western Union, and it was there by the time I got to the office.  Marie and I boarded a bus to Durango, where my husband would have to stop to change buses a few hours after Marie and I arrived there. I intended to head him off before he could get to Larry.

    I recall going to a movie in Durango to distract myself and pass the time while I waited for “Ford”. The movie was Summer and Smoke, and I left it before the end, in order to be sure I would not miss the bus on which he was riding.

    I remember him in his Class A uniform and the fat he had put on in training. I don’t recall much of the bus ride back to Wichita, except some of the scenery as we went through a deep shaded canyon of looming gray rocks, and a dinner stop where Marie clung to me crying and would not eat, would not make eye contact with her father. He was furious, and I was careful not to be alone with him. Letting him go off anywhere alone with Marie was out of the question.

    I was doing my best to placate and humor him. We caught the next bus eastbound from Durango, which left us with an overnight wait somewhere in the Rocky Mountains for a connecting bus to Wichita. We got a room in a shabby old hotel, and after Marie had gone to sleep we had six.  Ford’s usual pattern was to be as degrading to me as possible, demanding oral sex and then forcing his penis down my throat, pushing my head down on him.  During my pregnancy with Marie, a neighbor had shared some “marriage manuals” with me, and I had discussed foreplay and female orgasm with Ford.  He didn’t believe in them.  He preferred rape.

    I endured the return trip to Kansas with Ford.  He wasn’t there very long, planning to make a side-trip through Texas to visit his family on his way to Fort Dix, New Jersey where he’d get transport back to Germany.  The night he was to catch his bus, we left Marie with Granny and he took me out to dinner.   He gave it the full treatment, with phony and courtly manners and an expensive restaurant.

    As physically forceful and coercive as he was about sex, in emotional matters he was ingratiating and manipulative.  In the ambience of candlelight, crystal, and white linen, after the waiter had taken our orders, he handed me a gift-wrapped box.  It contained Chanel #5, a box of bath powder, vial of perfume, and cologne spray.  I clearly recall thinking how expensive such a gift must have been, just before he broke the spell by telling me he’d bought it in a duty free shop in Germany, for “next to nothing.”

    As we ate — I had steak, salad, baked potato, tomato juice and tea, with ice cream for dessert — he tried to get my assurance that our marriage was going to continue.  He plucked the old strings of pride and defiance with the us-against-the-world idea, saying that we couldn’t break up and prove that my mother and the teachers had been right about our marriage being destined to fail.

    There, in the busy restaurant, with him so spit-shined and proper in his Class A Army greens, being excruciatingly polite, I wasn’t afraid to tell him how I felt.  I said that it was over for me, that I wanted a divorce.  As the time approached for his bus to depart, he paid the check, put me in a cab back to Granny’s house, and told me to think it over.  He’d keep in touch.  The cab pulled away from the curb and I didn’t look back.  I was relieved to have gotten through the experience without either Marie or myself getting beaten up.  I was thinking about getting back to Larry as soon as I could.  I assume that a lack of money was what kept me from leaving immediately.

    With Mama sharing Granny’s one-bedroom house, Marie and I needed a place to stay. I found a small, rundown converted garage in an alley back of 1422 South Broadway. Amazing what I remember, and what I don’t recall, isn’t it? Of course, I could have the number wrong. Who knows? I don’t remember when I moved in there, but it must have been late spring or early summer, very soon after I left Mancos. I was there on my eighteenth birthday, because I recall one day at the pay phone a few blocks away, outside a Kroger store, a distant cousin spotted me from the doorway of a bar across the street and invited me over for a beer. I called across to him that I couldn’t drink yet, but that in three weeks I’d be old enough. That had to be late August.

    My last conversation with Larry might have been that day, but I think it was an earlier trip to that phone outside Kroger’s. I know that I had more than the one phone conversation with Larry after I went back to Wichita.  I left many messages for him.  Maybe about half a dozen times he returned my calls.  I don’t know why I stayed there and didn’t immediately return to him after my husband returned to Germany. Larry might have told me we would get together later when he had his own place, or he might have just been avoiding committing himself and I mistakenly assumed we would get back together. I missed him horribly and ended up weeping every time I talked to him. To the best of my recollection, in the last conversation I had with Larry, he was putting me off and I was crying, saying I wanted to come back to him NOW. Finally, he said forget it, he would never take me back, and hung up.

    I made numerous attempts to contact him after that. Sometimes my messages were ignored. On at least one occasion I spoke to his mother. She said he had gone to work on his Forest Service job and simply disappeared, didn’t come back. I believed her at the time and am less inclined to believe it now.

    I was living on my Army allotment, which meant a marginal existence even with the paltry rent at that bug- and rat-infested hovel on the alley. One or two mornings a week I would take Marie to Granny’s house and leave her with Mama and/or Granny while I went door-to-door selling dresses made to order from a catalog of styles and book of fabric swatches. I should say, “trying to sell” because I didn’t ever sell one.

    One of the things I recall from that summer was that there had been a child molester who had picked up several small kids in South Wichita. Whenever Marie was in the yard, I kept an eye on her. If she ever got out of sight of the open door, I’d walk to the door, open the screen and call her back into range. She’d answer, “I’m okay, Mommy,” and run back to where I could see her. One day I was reading on the couch and looked up from my book and noticed she was not there. Just as I started to rise to walk to the door, she ran up to the screen and yelled, “I’m okay, Mommy,” and went back to her trucks in the dirt.

    The next time we went to the library, I looked up ESP and started reading books by J. B. Rhine. There wasn’t much else in print on the subject at the time, but I read all I could find.

    CONTINUED

  • Finding and Losing the Love of my Life

    Backstory: When I was fourteen, I got married. The reason was sex: it was the 1950s in the Bible Belt, North Texas, and in that culture sex outside of marriage wasn’t acceptable. I had been a randy red-headed adolescent looking for someone to relieve me of my virginity since about age nine. When I was 13, I found a sixteen year old boy willing to do it in the back seat of a Chevy. When my mother noticed that my boyfriend and I were “getting serious”, she decided she needed to break us up. When she threatened to send me away to a boarding school, I pretended to be pregnant and manipulated her into signing consent for underage marriage.

    My young husband had been an abused child. We’d only been married a few months when he bloodied my nose and blacked both eyes, with one blow, for making a sarcastic remark to him. From there, it got worse. After I had a baby, he abused her, too. While I was pregnant, he found another woman and told me to get out.  When our daughter was about eleven months old, he threw me out again.  I let him sweet-talk me into taking him back each time. The second time, he followed me to California, then when my stepfather ran him off he went to live with an aunt of his in Stockton, while he looked for work.

    He found a job, rented an apartment, and sent for us.  Then he got fired soon after my daughter and I moved into the little basement apartment. He took his final paycheck and got drunk on the way home. First he sat down on the couch and dragged the baby’s toy box over to him. With her watching, one by one, he took her toys from the box and cut them up with his pocket knife: dolls, rubber squeaky toys: anything he could destroy, he did.  Of course, she cried.

    I talked to her soothingly, because I knew that if she cried he would start hurting her, “giving her something to cry about.” It was useless, because he wanted her to cry. He taunted her and roughed her up, pinching, poking, and shaking her.

    When the toys were all out of the box and their pieces scattered on the floor, he started hitting her and I started begging him to stop, crying, pulling on his arm to divert his sadistic acts from her to me. He beat on me until both Marie and I were worn out, sobbing and cowering, then he went to sleep.

    I picked up my daughter and ran from our apartment to the upstairs neighbors to call the police. Two cops came to the house, talked to me upstairs, observed the bruises and cut, swollen lips on both of us, then went downstairs, saw the destruction, and talked to my husband. After that they talked to me again and advised me that I could sign a complaint and they would take him to jail, but he would probably be out in a few hours at most, and would be angry. They asked if I had anywhere to go.

    I knew no one in that city except his family, and I had no money for bus fare to anywhere else, and I told them that. They talked to him again, and as a result of their talk, whatever they said, he decided to join the army. He told me it would give him a way to support Marie and me without our having to live with him. It sounded good to me.

    I called an uncle in nearby Sacramento. He came and took Marie and me to stay with his family for a while. There I soon found a live-in housekeeping job, where I was “babysitter” for a boy two years younger than I.  I had lied and said I was eighteen, not sixteen as I actually was.

    After a few months, all contrite and apologetic, my husband persuaded me to join him again and we went through the same pattern of abuse followed by contrition and promises and then more abuse until he was ordered to Germany.  Back in Kansas with my family, I was determined that once I got someplace where I could find a way to support myself, I wasn’t going back to him again.

    The story below starts in October of 1961, when I was barely 17 and Marie had just turned two. We were staying with my mother and her fourth husband on a hog farm outside Burrton, Kansas.  My husband had just gone to Germany in the Army.


    There weren’t many job opportunities around Burrton, but I took the one that came up. I was the sole person on the graveyard shift (midnight to 8 AM) at a combination gas station, general store and cafe, beside the highway. Too much responsibility for one with virtually no work experience, and only fifty cents an hour, that job lasted just a few weeks before I was nuts from the stress of trying to jump gas pumps, catch shoplifters, and cook burgers at the same time. My mother suggested I should stay with my Aunt Alice (whom everyone called Granny) in Wichita, where I could find a better job. Marie would stay on the farm with Mama and Grady for a week or so, then Mama would bring her to town and we would decide whether Granny could keep her while I hunted a job, or while I worked, if I had found a job by then.

    I put in applications all over town and was hired first by a drive-in restaurant near Wichita State University, for the swing shift: 5 PM to 1 AM. It was a long bus ride from Granny’s house, requiring two transfers. Buses stopped running before I got off work at night and I had to get a cab home. That didn’t leave much of my income to pay for our expenses. I had been there only a short time, when one of the other applications I’d filled out brought a call to an interview.

    When Dockum’s Drugs called, I jumped at the chance to work there. It was a much shorter bus ride, no transfers. Instead of car-hopping at night in the Kansas winter, I would be working a day shift indoors at a soda fountain where I could use the skills I had learned in Halstead when Mama owned the drugstore. The pay rate was higher, too, and tips turned out to be better. I loved it.

    The lunch counter was L-shaped, extending the full length of the store along the west wall and halfway across the south wall, to where a back door opened onto the elevator lobby for the office building of which Dockum’s occupied the ground floor. At the end of the L was a hinged countertop, open underneath, which could be raised to allow someone to pass through carrying supplies from the store room off the elevator lobby, or could be ducked under for a quick trip to the rest room. My work station was at that end of the counter.

    Most of my customers were the doctors and lawyers from the offices above, their nurses and clerical staffs. At break times, they would sit on the stools and drink coffee or ice cream sodas. At lunchtime, they often called down sandwich orders and picked them up at the pass-through counter. Skilled perfectionist that I was, I quickly gained a reputation among the secretaries for my ice cream sodas, sundaes and shakes. When we were busy at lunchtime, the manager and other counter girls would “let” me fill their soda fountain orders, too, since I was fast and neat and never got complaints. One of the other counter girls was Bobbi. She was frequently in tears at first because she got a lot of complaints about lumpy shakes or weak, thin sodas, etc. I earned her gratitude and friendship by helping out when she was rushed, and showing her how to do it right.

    Marie was staying part of the time with Granny while I worked, and with Mama on the farm whenever Granny went on one of her frequent trips to visit her children or grandkids. Marie missed me, and I missed her horribly. She was speaking in full sentences. One of those sentences had been repeated to everyone who would listen, by both Mama and me, who had heard her say it, in answer to an “I love you” from one of us: “ReeRee love ev’ybody.”  She was a delight, and we were both extremely happy to be free of her abusive father and among people who loved us.

    I had a class Q army allotment of $91.30 a month. With my wages and tips, and paying only minimal expenses at Granny’s, I could afford some correspondence courses toward finishing high school. I took psychology, advanced algebra and drafting. I stayed busy whether Marie was in town with me or on the farm with Mama, and I felt I was getting somewhere, had a future to look forward to for the first time since my marriage had gone sour about six months into it, when my husband moved his girlfriend into our house while I was helping my mother recover from her first heart attack.

    It was late in the winter, when I noticed a young man standing at the pass-through counter, and turned to wait on him. He wanted change for a quarter for the phone. I recognized him as Larry Ensley, who had been brought to my eleventh birthday party by his cousin, my neighbor and boyfriend Dennis Turner. I had fallen in love with Larry at first sight, kissed him and got kissed back, very passionately. That day at the party, I dumped Dennis, only to have Larry walk out of my life a few days later when he went back home from the visit to his cousins. He had been about thirteen, give or take a year, at the time.

    I said, “Aren‘t you Larry Ensley?” He said it was what he had once been called, but his name was really Turner. He recognized me and we quickly made a date to meet for coffee when I got off work. I distractedly worked the rest of my shift, wondering if he would really come back, or if he would vanish from my life yet again.

    He was there waiting when Dockum’s closed. We walked a few blocks to the cafe at the bus station, one of few places open in the area at that hour. We drank coffee and listened to arrivals and departures being called over the PA system. We must have talked, but I don’t remember much of what I said to him. I can only guess that I filled him in on what had been going on since I’d seen him last.

    He told me that he had worked as a gunslinger during the summer in the Wild West reenactments at Cow Town theme park, and had learned to do quick-draw well enough to win some competitions. He was a skilled stuntman, and got the plum job of “bad guy” which involved being “shot” off a running horse.

    He explained about the names, that Ensley was his step-father’s name and his younger brother’s and that he had always thought it was his name, too, until he had to register for the draft and saw on his birth certificate that his name was Turner, his mother’s maiden name. Until then, he had not known that he was illegitimate. He seemed a little uneasy about telling me that, but I couldn’t have cared less. There was a table between us and I was a married woman, or else I would have been in his lap, all over him. I never, before or since, had any man affect me that powerfully.

    He saw me to the last bus leaving downtown in my direction that night, and I don’t think we touched each other at all, in that meeting. But after that he was there every evening when I got off work, and there were several of those walks to the bus depot and coffee and conversation across the black Formica tables.  At some point our arms brushed together on the walk, and he took my hand. Then we were holding hands across the table, gazing into each other’s eyes, talking not about past and present, but about plans for the future.

    On my days off (Larry was between jobs and got a few temporary gigs distributing handbills and such, during this time) we would go to a movie or to the zoo in Riverside Park together, and when Marie was in town with me, we took her wherever we went. She liked Larry immediately, and he liked her. When she got tired of walking, it was Larry she turned to with a “pick me up” gesture. On one trip to a movie, she was begging to be carried all the time, until I figured out that I’d put her shoes on the wrong feet, and all three of us had a good laugh about that.

    There was strong chemistry and sexual tension between us all along, but we never discussed going to a cheap hotel (cheap would have been the only option) or finding a dark corner somewhere. One day Granny was gone on a visit and I had her house to myself while Mama had Marie in the country. Larry came over for a visit on my day off. We listened to the radio and then we danced. We had Granny’s big bed and our day together just flowed naturally into the best sex (the first really good sex) I had ever had. I was ecstatic during and euphoric for days after. It took our relationship onto a new level and we decided we would have to find a place and move in together.

    This story continues in part 2.

  • For anyone who has missed this essential fact about me in my profile
    and previous blogs:  I live in ALASKA, the Last Frontier, Land of
    the Midnight Sun, The Great Land, where the sourdoughs make huge
    fortunes panning gigantic gold nuggets out of pristine
    mountain streams.

    Well, that last bit was just to illustrate the misconceptions many
    of you Outside (Alaskanese for anywhere else) have about our
    state.  Gold mining here has long been mechanized.  Pans are
    mostly used by prospectors and tourists.  Mining operations have
    poisoned many of the richest placer streams, and dredges have turned
    others from crystalline burbling brooks to broad muddy creeks lined
    with big heaps of the gravel that was dredged out.

    The sourdough sobriquet now is most often applied to people
    otherwise known as “boomers”.  These are people who heard about
    the big bucks to be made on the pipeline and at Prudhoe Bay, and came
    here seeking the pot of gold.  True, those guys working at Prudhoe
    (where my friend Charlie said, in reference to the polar bear problem,
    “To step out of your trailer is to re-enter the food chain.”) get good
    pay and lots of perks, but there aren’t many jobs and the union wait
    list for them is long.  The pipeline construction was completed a
    couple of decades ago, but amazingly we still get some boomers coming
    up here looking for those jobs.  They are the new sourdoughs, sour
    on Alaska, with not enough dough to get back home.

    Dough is a big issue for a lot of visitors and new residents. 
    It costs more to live here than in any other U.S. state.  Most of
    that extra cost goes into the expense of shipping things up here from
    the Lower 48.  I once found a great deal on New Jersey greensand
    for my organic garden, only $5.00 for fifty pounds.  It would have
    cost me over $50 to have it shipped, and I’d have had to wait until a
    trucking company filled a van on the east coast with freight bound for
    Alaska, then trucked it to the west coast.  There, that van would
    be loaded onto a barge and would wait until the barge filled up and was
    towed up here for the goods to be distributed.   I remember
    one winter a tug lost three barges in a storm.  Stores from
    Anchorage to Fairbanks and beyond ran out of stuff like dog food and
    toilet paper, and a number of remote villages lost all their mail-order
    Christmas presents.  For many of us, mail-order is the easiest and
    cheapest way to shop.

    We who’ve been here a while just expect prices to be higher than
    what we see advertized in national media.  When McDonald’s® has a
    new Happy Meal® special, we know that another dollar will be tacked
    onto the price at Mickey D’s in town.  On my last trip to Wasilla,
    I noticed a new store: big sign, “Dollar Store”.  Below that, it
    said “15,000 items @ $1.25.”  Par for the course, but I can
    imagine some tourists’ reactions.  Burger King® here is apparently
    stuck using the same big plastic menu boards they use elsewhere. 
    In the section that is labeled “BK 99¢ Value Menu”, all the prices
    listed are $1.29.  It was the topic of conversation among those
    waiting in line the other day.  I just stood there, nothing to add
    to that conversation.  I know why it costs more, and for me the
    advantages of being here outweigh all that petty shit.

    Weather is another thing that breeds misconceptions. 
    Climate is what you expect; weather is what you get.  The
    situation with global warming has eliminated our climate, so all we
    have now is weather.  It still gets cold, although it’s not the
    year-round frozen wasteland that many people envision.  Even in
    the far Arctic the sea ice melts in summer.  Here in this
    sub-arctic valley, most years we can count on being snow-free through
    June, July and August, although a few frosts from mid-August on are
    common, and I’ve seen frost in July a few times.

    I’ve had conversations with summer visitors from places like
    Minnesota, who said they were familiar with cold.  I had somewhat
    the same misconception when I spent a winter above 13,000 feet in the
    Colorado Rockies to acclimate myself before coming here.  Yeah, it
    snows in those places, and the temps drop into the sub-zero Fahrenheit
    range for a few days each winter.  Here, when snow falls in
    October, we can count on it still being there under a lot of other snow
    come May or early June.  Last winter, we had two periods, each
    about ten days to two weeks long, when nighttime temps went down to -45
    F and never got above about -20 in the daytime.  I will never
    forget a photo I saw in a newspaper over ten years ago, when the annual
    military cold weather training maneuver “Operation Brimfrost”
    encountered a cold snap.  The reporter was interviewing a supply
    sergeant who had been talking about the way tires lose tread in big
    chunks, plastic parts act like pie crust and metal parts break as if
    they were plastic at -80 F.  The photo showed the sergeant
    standing on the surface of an open 5 gallon can of 30 weight motor oil.

    Cold, however, as any of my neighbors would tell you, is not
    the hard part of winter.  The duration of the cold is bad,
    yes.  Month after month of unrelieved whiteness will make people
    do weird things.  Drinking and domestic violence rates rise as
    winter wears on, but some responses are just whimsical, like
    scattering Kool-Aid® powder to brighten it up.  The year that
    there were two volcanoes spewing ash our way, the snow took on an
    interesting layered look with stripes of gray and brown between the
    white strata.  But the worst part of winter is the darkness. 
    I don’t have any idea what it must be like above the arctic
    circle.  In Barrow the sun goes down in November and comes back
    up, just barely, a little peek over the horizon, in January.  Here
    in sub-arctic suburbia, around the winter solstice, we get about four
    hours a day of sun, a weak cool light in deceptively warm colors due to
    its passage at that low angle through the atmosphere. 
    Sunrise to sunset, it just creeps a few degrees over the treetops and
    then it’s gone.  One of my happiest winter moments is the one that
    comes each February, when I can stand in the sun and actually feel its
    warmth on my face again.

    Not any of that, nor the mosquitoes in summer, nor living amid
    a lot of people even crazier than me, can dim my enjoyment of life in
    Alaska.  I know it’s not for everyone.  The woods around here
    are scattered with the abandoned cabins and boarded-up businesses
    of those who came here and either didn’t make a success of it
    economically or couldn’t endure or survive the physical and mental
    hardships.  But Alaska has been good to me.  It took me in
    with open arms, made me feel welcome and gave me a sense of belonging
    I’d never felt elsewhere.  I love the cool green brightness of
    summer, when I seldom see a neighbor except in passing as we are all
    busy on our own pursuits.  The winter social life provides the
    much-needed warmth everyone craves when the most pleasant place to be
    is around a fire with friends.  For half my life, I wandered and
    never expected to settle down.  Then I came here and forgot to
    leave.

  • I’m sorta out of commission following another (unexpected) trip to town, and I’ve got things that need to be done here, so blogging and commenting on your blogs is on the back burner for a while.


     I’ll leave you with some more of my weird neighbors… and by the way, Emily the Chicken Hypnotist isn’t really all that weird–not any more than the other members of that bicycling circus.


    Big Ed’s Place


  • Do you often feel like the coal miner’s canary? I do, and if you do you know what I mean. If you don’t, I’ll tell you. The bird twitters all the time, trills and sings, really brightens up the atmosphere down there in the mine. But when the canary serves his purpose is when the trilling stops. A miner’s ear is tuned to the birdie’s voice. The little yellow bird keels over at the slightest hint of poison gas down in the mine, giving the miner, if he’s fast and lucky, a chance to get out.


    I used to be the sort of person who keels over at the slightest provocation. It still happens, but much less often than it used to. In my youth, before I learned about blood sugar, I fainted a lot from hunger. A defective appestat is the way it was described to me. That term is less likely to evoke the image of a skinny girl starving herself than the proper medical term, anorexia. I didn’t have anorexia nervosa. I loved food and still do, hardly “feel fat” unless I’m looking in a mirror. I was a plump girl who often forgot to eat. One thing that would clue me to eat was the smell of food. Of course, that complicated things when I went into food service work. Metabolic chaos: one way to keel over a lot.


    Then there’s a somewhat different form of endogenous syncope: anoxia. I experienced it at birth. “Blue baby” is what my mother called it. Labor took three days and almost took both our lives. During the many high fevers I had in childhood, I’d hold my breath to relive the experience of anoxic unconsciousness. There is a visual effect, an auditory effect, and an olfactory effect along with the shrinking sensation and the texture… Do you know what I mean? Autoerotic asphyxiation… or strangulation not self-induced but violent and all but lethal… been there, done that, got the endless ringing in my ears.


    There are also many exogenous ways to render oneself unconscious and I’ve had a few. I’m a cheap drunk. One beer and I should not be driving. Half a Quaalude, and I can’t navigate. Heck, kiddies, I can think myself into a trance in a snap… lots of practice. I’ve no doubt I could also think myself dead if I tried. I’ve been willing myself to live for as long as I can remember; it oughta work the other way, too.


    One of nature’s simplest ways of knocking one out is the cranial concussion. Car wrecks, brutal boyfriends… not all of these blackouts are as much fun to recall as some others are. Two outstandingly weird ones were one of the earliest, when Cheeko, my father-in-law’s quarterhorse, ran under a tree limb, brushed me off, broke my arm and cracked my skull; and the second- or third-most-recent one, my “windfall”. Shortly after Greyfox took early retirement and came here, finances were very tight. I prayed for a windfall, then got blown off my feet by a gust of north wind in an icy parking lot. Less than a week later we had an insurance settlement. Be careful what you ask for, children.


    The most frustrating concussions have been ones that happened after I blacked out. It’s one thing getting whacked in the head and zonking out, and quite another just passing out, falling down, hitting your head and waking up with a swollen brain, puking if you try to move.


    Where’s all this going? I don’t know. I just recalled that canary story my mother told me years and years ago, and it brought up all these memories. I had asked her why I was always the first kid in school to come down with whatever disease was next to go ’round, the first one to get dizzy and fall down when we spun around. She tried to put a hopeful spin on it for me.


    I’ve figured out a lot of the mechanisms behind the various weaknesses, but don’t really know if there’s any productive purpose for the benefit of the planet or its population. It would be nice if there were. Could it be my dharma to be the bellwether for bad karma, the avant garde of affliction, maven of malfunction? What a mark of distinction! In a weird way I can see how that idea meshes with the Coyote Medicine, the exemplar of exactly what not to do.


    I know that for me, these foibles have served the purpose of keeping me humble. There is some balance after all, some strength to offset the weakness. I’ve a natural preference for dwelling on the positive aspects, taking pride in my intellect, intuition, will, perception, and guts. I can get so far up on my high horse that sometimes it takes a fall and a whack on the head to bring me down to earth. Works for me. What does the job for you?

  • There was a question about the photo at the top of the previous blog.  It was one of the last of those I took near sunset on the summer solstice.  I was standing at the northwest corner of our house (trailer), facing NNW toward the setting sun.  That’s the yard I see out the window, past the oil tank (visible in the preceding blog, the shot with Pidney the black and white cat) beyond this monitor I’m looking at.  This is Grammy Mousebreath, the other cat who trailed me on that walk.

  • Server trouble… at folksites, where I have the shaman and painswitch pages, and where I put up recent pictures of the neighborhood and sometimes even pictures of my jewelry (when I haven’t been so busy writing that I neglect to make jewelry) on the susitnart pages.  The trouble is:  no images, not even backgrounds.  It gives the sites a stark quality.  Since the pictures on shaman and painswitch are just to pretty it up, and the value is all in the text, it’s no real problem.  Wedding picture captions on the other site don’t do much for anyone, and I had intended to upload the new solstice sunset shots until I discovered that I was uploading them into a black hole apparently.


    So, instead of that, I’ve stuck a bunch of them here on Xanga, mostly in among the text on yesterday’s blog where I wrote about the walk when I took the pics.  Now I’ll get some lunch and then I will hit the books again.


    Oh, one more thing:  a great Alaskan business opportunity.  I can only guess at which Talkeetna business is “#1″, but whatever it is, you buy it, we’ll run it for you.


    P.S.  It’s nearly midnight Xanga time, and I never did hit the books today.  I’ve been swimming upstream (it is salmon spawning season after all) all evening, trying to comment and prop.  I’ve discovered that I can do one, but not both, except in rare and exceptional cases.  A few times, I went for the props, but most of you will notice that I’ve chosen to express myself rather than reward you with eProps.  So sue me.  I wish I had the skill to sort out the coding cockups, but this is far beyond my meager, obsolete, half-forgotten Fortran.  Bye for now.


  • My Philosophy of Life


    This one is tough… but not because I hesitate to reveal myself and be open to the sometimes less than tender mercies of my sharp and incisive, highly opinionated, often cold, preachy, mean or judgmental fellow Xangans.


    Whoa! If you’re thinking, “Hey! I’m not that bad,” I agree. I’ll take your word for it. All those words I used were meant to describe all or nearly all of the ways any of us might make it hard for each other to spill our guts. Maybe one or two of those words applies to you, eh? If not, okay, because none of that is why I find it difficult to complete this little exercise I’ve set for myself, to state my fundamental beliefs.



    Yaaaah!


    There’s the rub, the hangup, the hook. My most fundamental belief right now is that my highest goal is to transcend belief. How’s that for a neat little loop of a hook, huh? This is a mind that loves puzzles and paradoxes.  That does make it a trifle difficult to discuss my beliefs. Each time I root out, remember, track down and articulate a belief, *poof!* It’s gone, turned into a theory, a hope, a rumor or something… anything but something taken on faith alone. This mind needs to know.



    Lessee… where was I? I was out for a bit there, walking around the neighborhood with the digital camera, getting a load of shots of the solstice sunset. Not much of a sunset–prettiest ones are in winter when the southern sky is peachy or flame. This time of year the sun sets in the north, and it’s a long walk from here to anywhere north of here with an unobstructed view of the sunset. From here, it’s all trees. But the sky was interesting, a variety of clouds all around. And mosquitoes, in increasing numbers as the light faded. Two seasons we have: mosquitoes and no mosquitoes… or snow and no snow if you want to look at it another way. There will be dragonflies soon… probably are a few now, but I haven’t seen any yet this year. They don’t emerge until there are a lot of mosquitoes around for them to eat. Neat the way that works, isn’t it? Good plan. Just when we need them most, dragons to the rescue.



    But I digress. I was going to pour out my heart and soul here. Okaay. First thing to come to mind about which I have unequivocal knowledge, beyond all faith or doubt, is beauty. I sit here in beauty, and it’s lying over there on the floor in my dog Koji’s fur coat, big black leather nose and soulful brown eyes. I can hear the beautiful sounds not only of my own fingers on the keys of this laptop, but of Doug’s on the keys of the other machine with the modem that will convey these thoughts to you and all of cyberspace in the morning. That tappity-click has a restful rhythm: a beautiful dance for four hands.

    I’ve been out there walking with two beautiful cats, Pidney and Grammy Mousebreath, in a beauty so profoundly overwhelming it took my breath away, stopped me in my tracks a few times, with the way the birch leaves trembled and flashed in the wind, or the clouds shone white in blue spaces between the black spruce. Beauty is good, and that’s the truth.


    What else do I know? I know love. It is written that God is Love. I love. I am loved. Some part of me, an essential core of my consciousness, is love and a lot of people believe that is God. I like that idea. I fills me with joy. Joy is something else I know. It’s a feeling I recognize by its contrast with the other side of things. And those “two sides of things”– I know what that’s all about, too.



    I know it is not more nor less than perception, based on bilateral symmetry, in a bisexual species on a planet spinning on its axis as it revolves around a light source so that sometimes it’s light and sometimes it’s dark. I don’t perceive any of this in its absolute essence: the isness of it. All that my senses can register are the differences, the borders, the contrasts, the relativity of one thing set up beside another. From a distance it may appear black and white, but up close it is all shades of gray, and red, orange, yellow, green, blue, indigo, violet….



    That’s enough to know, for me, right now. I’d hurt my head if I were to strain beyond this for another scrap of knowledge tonight. And I was playing hooky anyway, when I started this blog. Behind this window is one with notes on some research that I’ve only just started, and the book on which I’m taking notes is due back at a library in Arizona about two weeks from now. I know a few things about time, I think… and I’ll keep thinking about it as I read and take notes, and I’ll get back to you on the time idea, some other time.



    **As I proofread this a final time, I caught some motion out of the corner of an eye. Out the window, a wolf loped by. If it was a dog, it was one of the big wolf hybrids we have around here. It looked wild… no, I’d swear it was wild. Koji agrees. The start, the quiet “whuff” and soft growl that escaped him is what our dogs do when a wolf or a bear is around. For stray dogs, it’s all “RURURUROOOF!”, a get-out-of-my-yard shout, not the soft, “Mom, there’s something big out there,” warning I just heard. It’s marvelous living here.**


    These images were captured around 11:30 PM, Alaska Daylight Time, June 21, 2002.



    Two hours later, I saw the sky begin, without having grown dark, to brighten with dawn, but I was asleep before sunrise.  I wouldn’t have gone out in the bugs to catch it, anyway.  I take far more photos in snow than in mosquito season.  Sourdoughs will tell you that our skeeters don’t carry diseases, but times and climate are changing.  I heard from a public health nurse that they have seen a few cases of a new strain of malaria in western Alaska.

  • The following was stolen from Got CALICHE?, my favorite email newsletter, the ONLY one I’ve kept for any length of time without cancelling in disgust.  It is clearly a case of copyright infringement for me to publish it here, and I was foolish enough, just today, to tell the editor about my blog here.  However, if just one of you finds this as laugh-provoking as I did, it will have been worth it.




    David_Doyel@URSCorp.com wrote:
    A high-profile research institution has announced the discovery of the heaviest element yet known to science. This new element has been tentatively named “Administratium.” Administratium has 1 neutron, 12 assistant neutrons, 75 deputy neutrons, and 111 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312. These particles are held together by a force called morons, surrounded by  vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons. Since Administratium has no electrons, it is inert. However, it can be detected as it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact. A minute amount of Administratium causes one reaction to take over 4  days to complete when it would normally take less than a second. Administratium has a half-life of 3 years; it does not decay but undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places. Administratium’s mass will actually increase over time, since each reorganization causes some  morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes. This characteristic of moron-promotion leads scientists to speculate that Administratium is formed whenever morons reach a certain concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as “Critical Morass.”  You will know it when you see it.

    Editor’s Reply:

    Given:  6.023 x 10(power 23) = avagadro’s number

    Rule: [t1 + t2 + t3 time delay for three-phase archaeology review], divided by [avagadro's number x administratium)] x 100 = a mole of morass

    Lab Note: As Administratium’s mass increases over time, some can tinker and create larger molecules which combine federalium or agencium, with adverse-effectium and ACHPium. These molecules serve like a catalyst in a chain reaction to make Administratium a more highly radioactive form of isodope. At this point, if you are standing in the trenches with goggles on — hoping to test soil and the level of politicium in the atmosphere — you really can’t argue sh.. from SHPOleum.

    *****************************************

    Contact the Newsletter Editor:

    archaeologist@rocketmail.com (e-mail)

    www.swanet.org (url)


    Well, did you laugh?  Did you?

  • Fixing Things and Things Fixing Themselves


    One of the recognized psychic
    “gifts” or talents is that of the “fixer”. I’d never heard of this
    until about eleven years ago when I was browsing through a stack of
    back issues of Woman of Power Magazine at the home of a friend. Prior to that, in the late ‘seventies, I’d seen an article in Psychology Today Magazine
    about unconscious technological adepts (UTAs) and maladepts (UTMs). I
    knew as soon as I read the psych article that I was a UTA, and when I
    encountered “fixers” on the list in the old Woman of Power, I recognized that they were the same as UTAs.

    My son Doug, this kid who takes care of me
    and probably takes as much of the physical strain off the old fart as
    he piles on mental stress to compensate for it, is a fixer, too. It’s a
    good thing for the household as a whole that there are two of us
    fixers, because Greyfox is a “breaker”, a UTM.

    The late physicist Niels Henrik David Bohr
    was perhaps the most famous of such maladepts. Physics experiments
    would go wrong if he just happened to be in the building at the time.
    His colleagues began scheduling their important experiments for times
    when they knew he would be away. One popular Bohr story tells of the
    time when he was traveling and a physics experiment planned for his
    absence didn’t come off properly. The men involved joked that perhaps
    he had returned early, but it was found not to have been the case. They
    attempted it again, and all went as planned. They later found out that
    at the time the first try failed, Bohr had been passing through the
    city on a train.

    The event that brought this to mind today
    was just one of a long series of “miraculous” mechanical resurrections
    I’ve witnessed. Months ago, the motorized turntable in our microwave
    oven stopped working. I think Greyfox was the last person it worked
    for. Doug and I had fiddled with it but had not taken the microwave
    apart. Yesterday, I was thawing some frozen strawberries, and it
    started turning again. Not only that, but it now works without the
    horrible grinding noise with which it used to start up every time.
    These events are occasions for laughter and comment when they occur,
    but none of us is surprised by them any more, and I for one never
    assume that there is any psychic or miraculous force behind them. I’ve
    been seeing things fix themselves all my life. To me it seems they just
    heal, as living things do, though I recognize the absurdity of that.

    We had been married no more than a year or
    two when Greyfox started asking me to drive his car for a while if it
    had started malfunctioning or making unidentified noises. When his
    watch stops or a flashlight won’t light, he hands it over to the kid or
    me, and more often than not, it works for us and continues to work for
    at least a little while longer after the old fart takes it back. If
    something is stubborn, and simply handling it and fiddling with its
    switches or whatever doesn’t fix it, I ask the kid to take it apart.
    But I insist that he put it back together again, also.

    I used to take things apart a lot when I
    was younger. It was mostly a matter of curiosity for me then, as it is
    now for Doug. He enjoys seeing the inside of things, tracing gear
    trains and such just as I did. When I was about three years old, my
    parents’ alarm clock quit working and I asked if I could take it apart.
    My father, a machinist by trade, shade tree mechanic and inventor by
    necessity (there’s a whole blog there for another time), had found and
    fabricated a set of small tools to fit my hands. He said I could take
    apart the clock only if I would put it back together. That became a
    standing rule in our house.

    He spread newspaper on the kitchen table
    and as I removed screws and parts he showed me how to line them up in
    order so that I could put them back together in reverse order. The
    clock was a large old-fashioned wind-up thing with two bells and a
    clapper on the top. As I disassembled it, my father explained that when
    this key turned that way, the spring tightened around its spindle, and
    when the spring unwound it caused the spindle to turn and made one gear
    turn that way while the one meshed with it turned the other way, and I
    got my first lesson in mechanics.

    We failed to find anything obvious that
    would account for the clock’s failure to tick. Since it was getting
    late, he guided me through the procedure of replacing each part and
    screwing them down tight. When it was done, I set the clock on the
    table and it started to tick. It worked perfectly for years after that.

    The talent has gotten me in trouble a few
    times, when some man’s ego would be stung as a mechanism he had given
    up on started working almost as soon as I laid hands on it. Women, as a
    rule, tend to be more appreciative of the gift.

    Now I haven’t the slightest idea if this
    next matter has any bearing on the fixer phenomenon or not. There is a
    clock hanging on our wall that was here when we moved in, a green
    plastic battery-powered kitchen-style clock. Sarah will know whether
    she left it here or if it was something Mark left behind. Whether this
    clock stops or goes doesn’t seem to have anything to do with the
    freshness of its batteries or anything else that I can perceive.

    I have observed the hands turning backwards
    at times. When it first stopped, I changed the batteries and it ran
    again. Another time, even though I didn’t think the batteries were so
    old as to be run down, Doug changed them and got it going again. But
    that time, with a new pair of Duracells®, it ran only a short while,
    then ran backwards a while (and yes, the batteries were in there the
    correct way ’round) before stopping.

    That time, when it started running again,
    it was as close to the correct time (as shown on our computer, the only
    reliable timepiece we have) as any other clock in the house was at the
    time. It has stopped and gone backward a few times since then, and the
    latest time it started up, it was showing standard time, though we are
    now on daylight savings. It may be coincidence (although I don’t really
    believe in coincidence) that the onset of all this backing and forthing
    and stopping and going of that clock coincided with Doug’s and my first
    discussions of a plot for a time-travel story we’ve tentatively titled The Rosetta Clock. It may be synchronicity. I don’t know.

    This latest starting of the clock came very
    close (though no one was watching to tell if it was synchronous) to the
    restored functioning of the microwave’s turntable. I sometimes wonder
    about this stuff, and wonder continues to enrich my life. Greyfox asked
    today, when we noticed the clock was going again, why I don’t get rid
    of it. “Is he kidding?” I wondered. That crazy clock is so very much
    more interesting than a clock that just goes on day after day in the
    same direction at the same clockwork pace. Don’t you agree?