March 23, 2005
-
Is Mercury retrograde, or what?
Recently, I was asked to perform a simple service, a writing project,
that, legally, is in a gray area. I’d not be breaking a law, but
I’m fairly certain that the person who asked it of me intends to use it
for a purpose that, if not strictly illegal, is probably not entirely
aboveboard, either.This is the sort of thing that might be considered a favor for a
friend, except that the person who asked me is a Xangan I hardly know,
and I was offered money for it.Without thinking it through fully, I agreed. At the time, it
seemed to be a miraculous windfall that the Universe was dropping in my
lap. The money involved would have fulfilled a current need I
have.But I reconsidered. Since I had already agreed, committed myself,
I was reluctant to back out. On the other hand, since no money
had been paid within the specified time, I felt justified. I sent
an email, saying I’d changed my mind and explaining my reasons.Today, I got a payment, later and less than promised. I don’t
know if the person didn’t get the email, or whether this is a ploy to
cause me to reconsider that refusal I’d made upon reconsideration.
Now that miraculous windfall seems more like an ethical test and a
financial white elephant. Returning the payment is going to cost
me, so I’m ending up deeper in the hole because I was already in the
hole enough to agree to something rather rash to begin with.I consulted my husband/soulmate/partner in crime about it. He had
been very pleased at first when I told him we’d be getting some
money. He seemed baffled when I told him later that I’d backed
out of the deal. Today when I told him I’d gotten the partial
payment, he reminded me of Scudder’s Law: When someone gives you
money, put it in your pocket. I dunno.Stupid, stupid, stupid!
Comments (11)
i think you should return it … seeing as the payer was late and didn’t give you all he said he would, you can back out …
I hope you can come to terms with whatever decision you make.
However, if it feels wrong, don’t do it.
This is interesting. I wonder what the message is?
well, yes… it IS…mercury that is because i typed a thoughtful comment and poof, it was gone. so, i had to think… did that comment deserve it’s disapperance or is it just a merc glitch.
we shall see…
i said something to the sort of… i felt your reconsideration of the project very solid for the reasons you state.
also, i felt that no one who was ethical or moral would try to manipulate you by ignoring the e-mail you sent and sending money. so… perhaps resending the mail and stating what you have here and asking their intentions by sending the late funds would be helpful. i don’t believe it should cost you to refund those funds based on the circumstances… and given this situation, if the money is requested returned and you do so… deducting the fee is prudent.
I’ve never heard of Scudder’s law… interesting. i hate to feel obliged to people who have no understanding of the trouble that has been caused… so i’d end up taking the sacrifice if the other party was unreasonable.
Keep it as a partial payment deposit and wait for the remainder before you deliver.
I’m with Talk Amongst Yourselves. Hang onto the money while you attempt contact again. If they don’t reply within a reasonable period of time, then keep the money. If they do reply and want the money back, then return it with the cost of returning it deducted. There’s no reason for you to short yourself for their sake, since you DID send a message telling them that you’d changed your mind. If you hadn’t send that message, THEN I think you would be obligated to take the financial hit.
Does that help any?
Oh, what a tangled web we weave…I find myself in these sorts of dilemmas from time to time. Good luck–I know you’ll make the right choice.
Hi hon–I reckon most of the folks saying give back the money are rich–that is, have luxuries like health insurance and running water and cars less than fifteen years old–and have a regular income. But I digress.
I have a longish note I posted privately, you might want to respond ASAP. Nothing dire.
Hi again–got confused amidst the welter of lite and packed in juice and yadda yadda yadda, but I did get SOME, and can get more, sale is on through this coming Tuesday. Also got cheap salad for me and more cheap spear grass.
Got a Deaver for you, the Stone (NOT Brass) Monkey. Paperback, no set due date.
One thing I keep forgetting to mention–that odd wound I got from the moc is getting odder. It isn’t scabbing up normally, but the site is sorta hard, yellow/green at the center, then white, then reddish, swollen and tender. WTF?
I’m not familiar with this Scudder’s law either, but my motto for such instances is almost always: “Take the money and run!”
Nevertheless, I would probably carry through with my side of the bargain regardless because I wouldn’t be able to handle such a thing hanging over my head :}
I agree with Lupa, but with the proviso that you don’t give back any money unless they insist, and then only – as she said- enough so you are not out anything. It sounds very guilt inducing, whatever it is.