January 14, 2003
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For that motherly bunch of Xangans who keep track of my health, I finally got the current month’s pills portioned out into their little bottles last night, and I’ve taken the first of today’s five med packs. After breakfast, I’ll take the second….
It’s not that I hate pills. The feeling isn’t that strong. Sure, if I’m taking a pill, I’d prefer that it be psychoactive in a pleasant way, no downers please. With these pills, there’s no rush, no euphoria… but I must admit that eliminating the dysphoria of sugar cravings is a definite plus. This five-times-a-day regimen is tough not just because I need to wash down that many pills, but because on some days I eat more pills, by weight and bulk, than food. For a food addict, that’s no fun.
It is no longer a raging hunger, but there is still a part of me that wants PIE. Last night, I made a gluten-free “dessert”: a batter of garbanzo, tapioca, amaranth and sorghum flours, with unsweetened canned apricots. I liked it so much that I was tempted to overeat, was even anxious a while lest I might have done that very thing, but no glycemic response nor inflammatory response ensued. *sigh of relief*
I went for more than a week without the amino acid neurotransmitter precursors that had been relieving my food cravings. There was some resumption of cravings, but to a much lesser degree than previously. The current batch of supplement packs contains a lower dose than the original batch, and if I’m going to taper off (as opposed to cutting them off cold turkey) the next time I will have to cut some pills in half, or find a source for lower dosages. I’ll think about that later.
For now, I’m off to find something for breakfast.
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Comments (11)
mmmmmmm…pie.
SuSu, how did you find out about getting control of the food addictions? Did you talk about this in a previous blog that I could click back to? So many of the things that you talk about sound like the same things I deal with, only I don’t have a clue how to go about getting in control of it.
SuSu, I just wanted to take a second to introduce myself. I’ve only been around for a few days, but you’ve been pointed out as a good read and I am trying hard to get caught up on all that is you.
What struck me was the pill thing. I have acute anxiety disorder. I’ve been pumped full of sedatives daily for about the last 6 years of my life. To say that I’m addicted to something that is supposed to help is an understatement. I travel 90 miles round trip for work, and if I get there and I discovery I don’t have my meds with me, I won’t hesitate to drive all the way back. In all honesty, if I got out of the car and realized that the crotch of my pants was missing, I probably wouldn’t pay it another thought and just go on working. That’s imbalance.
I love the lows though. Never enjoyed getting high, and honestly the only substances I use are the ones prescribed. There is nothing in this world that sets me more free than a sedative/painkiller/muscle relaxer mix. The meditation is intense and exact, and even more importantly they are not fake. It’s like skipping the stretching and going straight to running the marathon.
I’ll be around. Hope all continues well for you.
I’m on medication too for obvious reasons
i’m on medication. dayquil. allegra. tylenol. haha.
next up, vikadin. =)
Urgh, Vicodin… makes me hurl. Could have something to do with trying to eat about 20 of them last July, but I digress… Yeah, we just changed my psych meds because I could no longer handle the side effects, and now I am having other effects which I guess are from quitting them..? *sigh* Hopefully this new regimen will work out better. I still have utterly no energy, I guess I really should be taking vitamins and supplements but I feel like they don’t really work and then I get discouraged and… AAAAAHHH! I know, Su, I whine. As for a appetite-suppression supplement, hook me up! My last meds (that I just quit taking) had me eating so damn much that I couldn’t even think of healthy dieting. Methinks I am going to change primary care docs and get a new one who can help me more with weight management and constructive ways of dealing with fibro other than “here, take Vicodin”… gah… my worst enemy is no energy/ motivation — ideas on what things are good to take for that? Pain is pretty much nil these days, now its mostly low energy and bloating and feeling “blah”.
garbanzo…*shivers*
Other than that…it sounds good !
pie sounds good…and taking meds sucks…i hate the fact that my gram and mom had/have to take so many and i am afraid that i might end up like them…i’m sorry for you…
This made me laugh. The mother-people I mean. I do that to so many people, it’s embarrassing.
Not you though. I think it is because I think you can kick my ass. 
Do you find that the cravings come in waves, SuSu? I’ll crave for days and then boom, it’s gone. Weird.
Also, I’ve found that if I don’t eat anything ‘bad’ I don’t crave it so much. I mean, it looks good and sounds good, but I can say no without much regret. BUT, if I give in, I can expect cravings for days/weeks afterward. I’m not satisfied eating one slice of pie, I want the whole damn thing. heehee
Very interesting! Sounds like a bunch of your readers are willing to try this. (Too bad you’re not a doctor.)