October 27, 2005
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SICK
I’m trying to understand my own response to what I have just seen and
heard. Trying to understand… the reasons aren’t clear yet.Last weekend I revisited my own experience of torture.
I went carefully over the text I’d written three years ago, cleaned up
some grammar, syntax and punctuation, expanded on a few points and
clarified some facts. I made no effort not to engage with the
memories. I suppressed no emotions. I was undeniably
affected, but my response to those memories was mild compared to how I
felt as I listened on NPR this evening as John McChesney described on
All Things Considered, the torture death of Manadel al-Jamadi at Abu
Ghraib Prison two years ago.As sick as I felt, still at the end of the story when I heard that there was “more” at npr.org,
I went to the website. Up to that point, I had felt saddened and
bewildered at the brutality I heard the MPs describe, and at the tale
of the man’s attempts to tell his captors and tormentors that he was
dying, that he needed help, and at the callousness of the CIA agents
who steadily increased the pressure on him after he lost consciouness
until he was obviously dead.
My
outrage didn’t set in until I saw the pictures. The one of Sgt.
Charles Graner’s smirking thumbs-up over the iced-down corpse was
disgusting enough, but it was this shot that tore my heart out.
That’s the man’s widow and son, holding up that picture of that
fresh-faced young American GI grinning over the corpse of their husband
and father.I relate to the pain in the little boy’s eyes, and I empathize with the
offended incredulity I see on his mother face. For the life of
me, I cannot relate to the mindless grinning girl in that photo.
What could she be thinking?Maybe it’s because my torture was relatively brief and I survived, that
I feel so much more outrage and offense at what was done to Manadel
al-Jamadi. I don’t know. I have been taught that feelings
aren’t rational, so I’m probably wasting my time trying to make sense
of any of this.The abuse that led up to Jamadi’s death was horrendous and
shameful. That his corpse was desecrated and (as is evident in
the photo above) made fun of is at least equally shameful. How
will we ever make peace, much less make friends, in the Middle East,
this way?As if that were not quite outrageous enough, there’s this other story:
The Senate recently approved a defense bill
that would ban American forces from the use of torture. The White House
– concerned about their ability to fight the war on terror — has
threatened to veto the bill, unless language is added that would exempt
the CIA from the ban.
Comments (14)
I heard the same story on NPR this morning…but the picture really brings it home. Such tragedy.
To the GI, he’s a hunting trophy. Soldiers are trained to think of the enemy as animals to be exterminated.
it will soon be friday, best day of the week, enjoy it…thankx for the comment..
That just turned my stomach. I’d love to slap the smile off that girl’s face, but I think the man’s wife should have first dibs. It’s disgusting that people like that are allowed into our armed forces.
That story gave me goosebumps and saddens me to no end…. I can’t believe that girl in that photo… where is her heart? Her sense of decency? What is wrong with her and the others that joined in that they could even think of doing such things never mind actually doing them? I will never understand the lack of humanity that so many out there seem to wallow in…. terrible, sick and just unacceptable…. ahhh!
This hurts my soul.
How did you find me? Never should we make a game of death, no matter what the circumstances. Even perhaps if the one dying is someone who has killed one, or some of our loved ones. Life is precious, not a joke. Yes, our actions invoke consequences, and I believe that there are some cases where taking lives deserves a death sentence. Even still, life or death isn’t something to joke about!!! People can be so mindless sometimes. I read one of your previous posts and I’d just like to say that you should never be ashamed of your feelings, or feel that you have to surpress them.
What is the most frightening to me is that you can tell, by this photo, what the value of human life is today. I am with Rebel_In_Slacks: the whole thing hurts my soul.
I think anyone using torture as a means to treat human beings whether you agree with thier politics, religion or what ever is wrong and I hope that the bill gets passed and it includes the CIA
I read about the bill last week or so. it was a stroke of brilliance to add it as a rider to the war funding. bush’s threat to veto may be an empty threat. I don’t see how he can afford to wait till the houses repass it (for funding).
the tortures leaved me freaked out that more people aren’t freaked out.
Death to the vile scum infesting the White House and a pox on them and all their relations.
I’m really wondering why I’m so cold lately… although on an intellectual level I can acknowledge and agree with all that has been said here, it doesn’t move me much right now. (other than the look on that child’s face…shell shock du jour) I suppose if I weren’t so exhausted right now it would be a good idea to investigate whether my recent experiences are what has caused this apathy… meds maybe? I’d ask the doctor but I’m not convinced that she’d have the answer…sigh.
yep, dick cheney himself went to the senate to ask that the CIA be exempt. and president w. is completely ready to veto the bill. its bad enough this stuff goes on covertly but then they come right out in the open about it, just so people will not be punished when the details of all the torture come out in a few years. but its all in the name of “freedom” right? ha.