May 1, 2003
-
Celebratory
Xangaversary
Retrospective
I thought, when one of the Grandmothers came to me in that dream and said I needed to keep a journal, that it was for my health. That was uppermost in my mind at the time.
This was my first post here:
Extinction Burst
Lab rats and various primates including Homo sapiens exhibit a behavior pattern that researchers have called the extinction burst.
A man may approach an elevator, press the button, wait, then push it again. He may grow restless, look around, pace, then go back and push the button again. Eventually, he may tire of waiting and think of leaving. Before walking away, however, the disappointed one may push the button several times in rapid repetition. That is the extinction burst.
Extinction bursts can be seen in many common patterns of action. There is the “last fling” exhibited in bachelor parties and the binges from which many sailors have been dragged or carried by their mates just as the ship weighs anchor.
One of the most perilous times for an addict is right at the point when he has decided to go into rehab. Those extinction bursts can be the death of the addict.
Baffled at my own recent self-destructive behavior as I indulge my cravings for allergic/addictive foods, I’ve searched for answers. Recognizing this current eating binge as typical of the extinction burst pattern may clue me to what is going on, but it doesn’t begin to enlighten me on when or how it might end.
Am I digging my grave with a fork and spoon–or is this just another in a long series of healing crises for me?
For half of this first year here, I struggled with that, and then I quit. Detox and withdrawal are past, now, and there has proven to have been much more for me to do with my journal than just work on my health.
When first my eldest grandchild contacted me, and then I found my first-born son and learned of yet another grandchild, and then of the birth of two more great-grandchildren, my Xangan friends shared my pleasure. This pic is Miranda, my eldest great-grandchild, daughter of my grandson Dennis, holding her brother Seth.
Your responses to my first bits of memoirs (here and here), encouraged me to continue. That project has been on the back burner for a while, as I’ve been building the site at KaiOaty‘s place and doing my favorite work over there. I will get back to it soon. I sorted through a bunch of old pictures the other night… refreshing a few memories.
I took you along as Doug and I went on some runs to the spring for water.
.
.
.
We shared the “fun” as we did our inexpert best on a tight budget to cover the holes in our roof before snow fell last fall.
I’m looking forward to more.
There are some great things about this life as a semi-recluse out here in the woods.
Some of the greatest things are you people with whom I share my life on the web. Thanks for one of the best years of my life.
Comments (11)
Happy One Year, Kathy!! Personally, I am grateful to whatever brought you here….I’m sure I’m not the only one upon whom you have made a lasting impression.
Happy Anniversary! Hard to believe it’s been a year, already!
Happy Anniversary!! May it be the first of many!
Just a year? I am impressed at the creation of your personal history in that time.
Feels like I’ve been reading you for a year, yet alone how long you have been here. I always like this place because I have to think about what you’ve wrote when I’m done reading it. That doesn’t make it very conducive to comments from me, but I suspect you will relish the notion you make me think more.
Thanks for giving us that first post again, too.
Thank you dear sister……send much energy to Rosie, and keep light flowing for her dear friends.
God bless…….Atoka
Such a great deal of work–both what we readers can see and also the personal, behind-the-scenes kind.
Goddess bless,
michelle
Hi there,, you visited me and now i visit you :O) Wow from the looks of this site, reading here and there and clicking on some of those wonderful links, you are a very creative and fascinating person!! Looking forward to knowing you better, I am FLATTERED you came by :O)
Happy Xangaversary! You’re doing great, keep it up!
No.
Thank you.
Everyone who truly explores themselves here holds up a mirror that helps the people who read to explore their own self.
You hold up a very clear and honest mirror.
Happy Anniversay !!!